IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts showed how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts showed how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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From the given information, the
money
Use synonyms
 income for the
police
Use synonyms
 and the
police
Use synonyms
expenses
Use synonyms
measured
Add a missing verb
are measured
show examples
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
million pound
Add a hyphen
million-pound
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 unit .
Then
Linking Words
,
and
Correct word choice
apply
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the income itself
classified
Add a missing verb
is classified
show examples
 into three different categories ( national government, local taxes, and others ) divided over two years 2017 and 2018 .
In addition
Linking Words
 to that the
expenses
Use synonyms
 in each pie chart beneath the table
classified
Add a missing verb
are classified
show examples
 into three categories,
salaries
Use synonyms
, technology, building ,and transport . Each chart
represent
Change the verb form
represents
show examples
a
Change the article
the
show examples
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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 2017 and 2018 respectively .
Overall
Linking Words
, it’s clear that among the resources of
Use synonyms
police
Correct article usage
the police
show examples
budget
Add a comma
budget,
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 the national government ranks highest
during
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2017 and 2018.
Similarly
Linking Words
, for
salaries
Use synonyms
 which
takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
show examples
 the majority of
money
Use synonyms
 as
expenses
Use synonyms
 of the
police
Use synonyms
 station.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, the national government as a source of income increased slightly from 175.5
m
Use synonyms
 (2017) to 177.8
m
Use synonyms
 (2018) followed by local Taxes which
rosed
Correct your spelling
rose
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 significantly from 91.2
m
Use synonyms
 (2017) to 102.3
m
Use synonyms
 (2018) and other sources barely 0.5
m
Use synonyms
 grew .
Thus
Linking Words
, the total amount of
money
Use synonyms
 jumped to 318.6 (2018) from 304.7 in the previous year. To elaborate, the categories of
money
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 outcome divided into 3 main
expenses
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 , the biggest percentages goes for
salaries
Use synonyms
 in both years . 2017 the
salaries
Use synonyms
reaches
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 75% of the total
money
Use synonyms
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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spent
then
Linking Words
 dropped
little
Correct article usage
a little
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 to reach 69% in 2018 ,particularly. The building and transport remained constant over
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 by 17% . At
Linking Words
last
Add a comma
last,
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 the technology outcome is the smallest percentage 8%
then
Linking Words
 14% for 2017
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 2018 respectively.

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Contractions: Don't use contractions.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words money, police, expenses, salaries, m with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "divided" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reaches" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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