IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The pie charts below show the comparison of different kinds of energy production of France in two years.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The two pie charts illustrate the proportion of five
energy
Use synonyms
sources
Use synonyms
 (coal,
gas
Use synonyms
,
petro
Correct your spelling
petrol
, nuclear and other
sources
Use synonyms
) in France in two years.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 both coal and
gas
Use synonyms
 accounted for over half of all
energy
Use synonyms
sources
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
least was other
energy
Use synonyms
sources
Use synonyms
. There was only a minimal increase in the output of
gas
Use synonyms
 and coal,
whereas
Linking Words
 nuclear and other
sources
Use synonyms
 almost doubled . The petro was the only source to decrease over the period.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, coal dominated all
sources
Use synonyms
 in both years, it had the highest production in 1995 with 29.80% and 30.93% in 2005,
whereas
Linking Words
gas
Use synonyms
became
Verb problem
came
show examples
 second after coal, the figures show a slight increase
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 its yield, it rose from 29.63% to 30.31%. The use of nuclear power rose significantly from 6.40% in 1995 to 10.10% in 2005. Other
sources
Use synonyms
 of
energy
Use synonyms
 production accounted for 4.90% in 1995 and climbed to 9.10% in 2005.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, petro use dropped from 29.27% to 19.55% .

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, sources, gas with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Nuclear energy
  • Renewable energy
  • Non-renewable energy
  • Technological advancements
  • Government policy
  • Environmental policies
  • Investment in renewable technologies
  • Traditional energy sources
  • Coal usage
  • Natural gas
  • Environmental regulations
  • Energy consumption
  • Energy production levels
  • Proportion
  • Broader trends
What to do next:
Look at other essays: