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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows the average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line chart below
demostrates
Correct your spelling
demonstrates
 the
emissions
Use synonyms
 of carbon dioxide in average consumption per person in four countries over the period.
Overall
Linking Words
, in both Portugal and Italy, CO2
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased rapidly over the entire period, in
others
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
Sweden and
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 greenhouse gases
were decreasing
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 considerably from 1967 to 2007.
To begin
Linking Words
, in Sweden
emissions
Use synonyms
 of CO2 stood at around 8.3
tonnes
Use synonyms
 and rose sharply to above 10 and
the
Correct your spelling
then
show examples
 showed
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 dramatic fall of approximately 5
tonnes
Use synonyms
,from 10.3 to roughly 5.3
tonnes
Use synonyms
. From 1967 to 2007,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom experienced
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 gradual reduction of approximately 2000
kq
Correct your spelling
kg
km
kb
. In 1967, Portugal's CO₂
emissions
Use synonyms
 per person were around 1 metric tonne, significantly lower than Italy's 4
tonnes
Use synonyms
. Both countries saw an increase, with Portugal reaching approximately 6
tonnes
Use synonyms
 by 2007,
while
Linking Words
 Italy peaked at around 8
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in the late 1990s before declining to 7.5
tonnes
Use synonyms
 by 2007. Italy consistently had higher
emissions
Use synonyms
, but Portugal's growth rate was more pronounced over the period.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words emissions, tonnes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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