The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where revelant.

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where revelant.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where revelant.
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This
Linking Words
bar chart depicts the destination of England graduates excluding
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
did
Wrong verb form
done
show examples
after leaving campus in 2008. It is clear from the graph that, the total of
further
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and
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
Use synonyms
study
Use synonyms
is higher than others for both levels.
According to
Linking Words
what is shown, for undergraduate
students
Use synonyms
+17,000 are working
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
, about voluntary
work
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misspent
time
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that is
Linking Words
representsing
Correct your spelling
representing
around 3500 from
overall
Linking Words
.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
Further
Linking Words
study
Use synonyms
that
Linking Words
is illustrate
Change the verb form
is illustrated
show examples
above
Change preposition
apply
show examples
29,000
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
is
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
number! The total of
unemployment
Replace the word
unemployed
show examples
students
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less
Add a missing verb
is less
show examples
than 16,500.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
, the postgraduate spent the
time
Use synonyms
for both
further
Linking Words
study
Use synonyms
and,
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
which are
present
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
approxemately
Correct your spelling
approximately
higher than 2500
students
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for each.
However
Linking Words
, only 345 engaged in voluntary
work
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but,
Correct article usage
the unemployement
show examples
unemployement
Correct your spelling
unemployment
total is 1625.  In conclusion, we could say that, the
students
Use synonyms
in both various academic levels they
are prefer
Change the verb form
prefer
show examples
to invest
the
Change the word
their
show examples
time
Use synonyms
by working hourly per
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
day or
Linking Words
further
Add a missing verb
doing further
show examples
study
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further, that is".
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words time, work, study, students with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • full-time work
  • graduate
  • postgraduate
  • trends
  • part-time work
  • further study
  • gap year
  • traveling
  • unemployment
  • percentages
  • proportion
  • significant differences
  • subsequent activities
  • career progression
  • academic advancement
  • job market
  • vocational training
  • data interpretation
  • employment sector
  • career-oriented steps
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