Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experince and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.(Bayram)

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With the prevalence of a competitive
job
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market,there is an actual debate between an educational degree and practical
experience
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.
While
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the broad masses think that universities and schools are essential,others argue that individual abilities and trials are more necessary.
This
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essay will provide perspectives for both of them. In
favor
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favour
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of the first argument,the
education
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system has a huge role
on
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in
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graduates
work
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working
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the best jobs.The university ensures critical thinking and networking
skills
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to
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for
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all candidates.
For example
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,each student is willing to get an internship and volunteer program for 4 years.They may improve communication and adaptation
skills
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through these opportunities.
Additionally
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,some fields
such
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as medicine and law which have crucial roles in society require a good background to be sure.
For instance
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,when graduates apply for vacancies on websites,they encounter educational requirements.
On the other hand
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,
experience
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and soft
skills
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give a chance to survive in competitive work conditions.Including
this
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,good interpersonal
skills
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obtained from previous trials and special abilities for various jobs.Because real-world
experiences
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provide a problem-solving skill and outlook.In the work environment,there are many successful employees without educational backgrounds.The entrepreneurs and people who manage private businesses.Their main purpose is that rely on previous
experiences
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.
Besides
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,it gives autonomy and self-confidence about achieving a
job
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.
For example
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,the most popular businessman-Richard Branson reached a high level for his Virgin Group companies in
industry
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the industry
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.He always emphasizes the role of
experience
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during his speech. In my opinion,both sides have a huge impact
to find
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on finding
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a
job
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.But,each potential candidate should create a balance between
education
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and
experience
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.
For instance
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,students have a chance to use part-time internship programs
while
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they are continuing with university life.It is
a
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the
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best approach to finding a solution. In conclusion, hands-on
experiences
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and
education
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in universities are the best ways to get a
job
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.One of them emphasizes that some fields require an
education
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while
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another supports previous
experiences
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in real cases.So,my opinion is that all graduates must compile a balance between learning and soft
skills
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.

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introduction
The introduction clearly outlines the debate and sets the structure of the essay nicely. However, consider adding a more specific thesis statement to clarify your opinion from the beginning.
coherence
The paragraphs are generally well-structured, but some sentences could benefit from clearer linking words or phrases to enhance the logical flow between ideas.
supporting points
You provide good examples, but ensure they are elaborated on more to enrich the argument and show deeper analysis. This will strengthen your ideas significantly.
content
Your essay presents both sides of the argument effectively, showing an understanding of the discussion around education versus experience.
supporting points
You offer relevant examples, such as Richard Branson, which support your opinions well and demonstrate real-world applications of your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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