Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experince and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.(Bayram)

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With the prevalence of a competitive

job

Use synonyms

market,there is an actual debate between an educational degree and practical

experience

Use synonyms

While

Linking Words

the broad masses think that universities and schools are essential,others argue that individual abilities and trials are more necessary.

This

Linking Words

essay will provide perspectives for both of them. In

favor

Change the spelling

favour

show examples

of the first argument,the

education

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system has a huge role

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show examples

graduates

work

Wrong verb form

working

show examples

the best jobs.The university ensures critical thinking and networking

skills

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Change preposition

for

show examples

all candidates.

For example

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,each student is willing to get an internship and volunteer program for 4 years.They may improve communication and adaptation

skills

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through these opportunities.

Additionally

Linking Words

,some fields

such

Linking Words

as medicine and law which have crucial roles in society require a good background to be sure.

For instance

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,when graduates apply for vacancies on websites,they encounter educational requirements.

On the other hand

Linking Words

experience

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and soft

skills

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give a chance to survive in competitive work conditions.Including

this

Linking Words

,good interpersonal

skills

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obtained from previous trials and special abilities for various jobs.Because real-world

experiences

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provide a problem-solving skill and outlook.In the work environment,there are many successful employees without educational backgrounds.The entrepreneurs and people who manage private businesses.Their main purpose is that rely on previous

experiences

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Besides

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,it gives autonomy and self-confidence about achieving a

job

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For example

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,the most popular businessman-Richard Branson reached a high level for his Virgin Group companies in

industry

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the industry

show examples

.He always emphasizes the role of

experience

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during his speech. In my opinion,both sides have a huge impact

to find

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on finding

show examples

job

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.But,each potential candidate should create a balance between

education

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and

experience

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For instance

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,students have a chance to use part-time internship programs

while

Linking Words

they are continuing with university life.It is

Change the article

the

show examples

best approach to finding a solution. In conclusion, hands-on

experiences

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and

education

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in universities are the best ways to get a

job

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.One of them emphasizes that some fields require an

education

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while

Linking Words

another supports previous

experiences

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in real cases.So,my opinion is that all graduates must compile a balance between learning and soft

skills

Use synonyms

i.nureddinnThu Apr 03 2025

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introduction

The introduction clearly outlines the debate and sets the structure of the essay nicely. However, consider adding a more specific thesis statement to clarify your opinion from the beginning.

coherence

The paragraphs are generally well-structured, but some sentences could benefit from clearer linking words or phrases to enhance the logical flow between ideas.

supporting points

You provide good examples, but ensure they are elaborated on more to enrich the argument and show deeper analysis. This will strengthen your ideas significantly.

content

Your essay presents both sides of the argument effectively, showing an understanding of the discussion around education versus experience.

supporting points

You offer relevant examples, such as Richard Branson, which support your opinions well and demonstrate real-world applications of your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

315 words

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Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experince and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.(Bayram)

Your opinion

Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that public health of a country can be improved if the government make laws regarding nutritious food but others think that it is the matter of personal choice and personal responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more parents are deciding to educate their children at home rather than sending them to school. What are the causes of this phenomenon? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

The best way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home to work, education or shopping. To what extent do you agree or disagree?