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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below give information about the number of train passengers and the percentage of trains running on time from 2000 to 2009 in Japan.

The charts below give information about the number of train passengers and the percentage of trains running on time from 2000 to 2009 in Japan.
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The line charts below
compared
Wrong verb form
compare
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 the amount of train
passenegrs
Correct your spelling
passengers
amd
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and
 the portion of
trains
Use synonyms
 operating on
time
Use synonyms
 over 9 years in Japan.
Overall
Linking Words
, the numbers of passengers kept
fluctanting
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fluctuating
 and most of
Use synonyms
trains
Add an article
the trains
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 running were on
time
Use synonyms
, meeting the expected target
during
Change preposition
for
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 9 years. Obviously, the demographic of
trains
Use synonyms
japanese
Change the capitalization
Japanese
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 passengers reached
teh
Correct your spelling
the
 bottom in 2003, but
magnificantly
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magnificently
significantly
 soared
the
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to the
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 summit in 2005. Soon in 2006,2007 and 2008, the population of
Use synonyms
trains
Change the noun form
train
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 riders chronicly fell down from 47% to 40%, and the trend
switched
Verb problem
changed
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until
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in
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 2009. In terms of the percentage of
trains
Use synonyms
 running on
time
Use synonyms
,
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2001,
initial
Correct article usage
the initial
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 portion
were
Verb problem
did
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 not meet the targeted goal. Until 2002, 95% of
trains
Use synonyms
 were setting off on
time
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, which
were
Change the verb form
was
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 in
aligh
Correct your spelling
alignment
 with requests.
Then
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 situation continued to explode to 96% in 2004, and suddenly dramatically crashed
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 92% in 2006. When
time
Use synonyms
 proceeded into 2007, a
sharpenly
Correct your spelling
sharply
sharpening
sharpened
increasing
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increase
show examples
 had been witnessed in the proportion of
railway
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railways
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 operating on
time
Use synonyms
, from 93% to 97%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words trains, time with synonyms.
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