IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Traffic congestion and air pollution are becoming problematic in most cities around the world. People must be encouraged to use their cars less and public transport more. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is often argued that roads with full
Use synonyms
cars
Change preposition
of cars
show examples
 and filthy
air
Use synonyms
 are
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
 quandaries in the vast majority of
contries
Correct your spelling
countries
 on
this
Linking Words
 planet. Many humans should be told to diminish utilizing their motors and
intensivy
Correct your spelling
intensity
intensive
intensively
 taking public
tranportations
Correct your spelling
transportation
transportations
. I strongly agree that we should abandon our
cars
Use synonyms
 for the sake of protecting the
invironment
Correct your spelling
environment
. Saving our world from
air
Use synonyms
 pollution is crucial.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
People
Use synonyms
 have been living
under
Change preposition
in
show examples
diffecult
Correct your spelling
difficult
 times lately because of
unclear
Correct article usage
the unclear
show examples
 atmosphere and the heavy
demanding
Fix the agreement mistake
demands
show examples
 on motorcycles. Gasoline
cars
Use synonyms
 have badly affected our nature and our
air
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, If
people
Use synonyms
 reduce using their
cars
Use synonyms
 significantly what happens is,
Use synonyms
air
Add an article
the air
show examples
 becomes better and trees can produce more oxygen
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 us.
As a result
Linking Words
, our lifestyle will be optimized. Another reason
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
why
people
Use synonyms
 should
metigate
Correct your spelling
mitigate
 harnessing petrol engines is related to
people
Use synonyms
's health. Citizens must maintain a healthy
inveronment
Correct your spelling
environment
 in order to
breath
Replace the word
breathe
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
fresh
air
Use synonyms
 and to take care of
individuals
Change noun form
individuals'
individual's
show examples
 bodies.
Morover
Correct your spelling
Moreover
, A study was
contucted
Correct your spelling
conducted
 three years ago by a group of
scientests
Correct your spelling
scientists
 implying that breathing dirty
air
Use synonyms
 can be tremendously
detremental
Correct your spelling
detrimental
 to
human kind
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humankind
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, In major
cities
Add a comma
cities,
show examples
 many men and women have died because of inhaling
fealthy
Correct your spelling
healthy
filthy
air
Use synonyms
 which was a tragedy for their families.
To sum up
Linking Words
, Living
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
great
Correct article usage
a great
show examples
invironment
Correct your spelling
environment
 plays a substantial role in enhancing the quality of living.
People
Use synonyms
 must be
oreinted
Correct your spelling
oriented
 to use metros and
elecrtic
Correct your spelling
electric
 trains to protect the Earth. On top of
this
Linking Words
, we had better
to
Remove the marker
apply
show examples
look after
ourselfs
Correct your spelling
ourselves
show examples
 by diminishing the usage of trucks in order to live longer and healthier.

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language
Try to avoid spelling errors and ensure proper use of vocabulary. Review the essay for typos and incorrect word forms, which can impact clarity.
coherence
Ensure that your ideas are clearly linked, and consider using more cohesive devices to improve the flow of your essay. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.
task achievement
Make sure each point is fully developed and supported with examples. Some points could benefit from further explanation or detail to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
You have presented a clear opinion on the topic, which is essential for task achievement.
coherence
Your introduction outlines the main issues effectively, setting a good foundation for your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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