Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that university

students

Use synonyms

concentrate

Change preposition

on studing

show examples

studing

Correct your spelling

studying

solely subject for a qualification,

while

Linking Words

others argue that they

also

Linking Words

have to attend different major lectures. I will discuss both perspectives and explain why I personally agree with learning other subjects

in addition

Linking Words

individuals'

Fix the agreement mistake

individual'

show examples

major

Fix the agreement mistake

majors

show examples

. Those who support the idea that one major is enough for studying

Change preposition

apply

show examples

college

students

Use synonyms

claim that it helps to save time, money, and energy.

For example

Linking Words

, international

students

Use synonyms

and their parents can save money if

students

Use synonyms

graduate faster by reducing living expenses and boarding fees.

Additionally

Linking Words

, they believe that majoring

only

Change preposition

in only

show examples

one subject offers more opportunities after they graduate the universities, which can boost

employments

Fix the agreement mistake

employment

show examples

On the other hand

Linking Words

, proponents of learning about other subjects

instead

Linking Words

of choosing only a main subject claim that it offers diverse choice alternatives after graduation.

For instance

Linking Words

students

Use synonyms

who major

both

Change preposition

in both

show examples

Industrial Design and Management can engage

various

Change preposition

in various

show examples

fields and

also

Linking Words

they can run their own

firm

Fix the agreement mistake

firms

show examples

if they want. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

both sides have valid points, I believe that learning things which are not related to their main subjects

benefits

Replace the word

is beneficial

show examples

because

this

Linking Words

creates more opportunities.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is important to balance between their main study and other majors.

ryunman0901Sun May 11 2025

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Task Achievement

You provide a clear introduction that outlines the two perspectives, but it would benefit from a stronger thesis statement that clearly states your opinion. Consider rephrasing your opinion to make it more assertive.

Task Achievement

In your body paragraphs, while you introduce both sides effectively, ensure that you directly relate your examples back to your main argument to strengthen your points. Add more specific examples where possible.

Coherence and Cohesion

Try to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use connecting phrases to help the reader follow your ideas more easily, which will enhance coherence.

Coherence and Cohesion

Make sure each point is well-developed with at least two or three supporting sentences. This will help your ideas to be clear and comprehensive.

Content

The essay clearly presents two different viewpoints, and you do a good job of acknowledging both sides before offering your own opinion, which shows critical thinking.

Coherence and Cohesion

You have structured your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is essential for clarity and organization.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

202 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Broaden
Perspectives
Specialize
Critical thinking
Problem-solving skills
Career success
Interdisciplinary connections
Structured path
Clear goals
Creativity
Innovation
Academic credibility
Recognition
Balance
Exploring

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Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways thn publis transport systems such as railways and trams. To what extent do you agree or disagee?

Some people believe that children should continue schooling until 18 years old while others suggest that schooling till 14 years of age is enough. Discuss both views and present your opinion.

More and more people buy and use their own car. Do you think the advantages of this trend for individuals overweigh the disadvantages for environment?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be diverless. The only people travelling insifode these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of diverless vehicles outweighs the disadvantage.

In many countries, students' concentration in the classroom has decreased. What are the reasons for this? What are some possible solutions?