In recent time, young adults are spending less time with their families and more with their friends. Why has this occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend their time at home?

Nowadays, young
community
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communities
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are spending more time on friendships
instead
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of their families.The reasons are various, mostly because of the change of era. I don't think that
parents
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should force the younger generation to spend time at home. Young
people
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have a different living environment from their
parents
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.
Firstly
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, they are used to a faster pace of lifestyle, which contradicts the slower pace that
parents
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prefer.
Secondly
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, the opinions that both sides hold are not the same too, which causes quarrels and harms family harmony.
Thirdly
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, when hanging out with friends, young
people
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feel relaxed, which mitigates the pressure caused by work,
however
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, sometimes
parents
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can't give reasonable solutions. In fact, though I suggest that more time should be spent on families, I disagree that
parents
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should force their children to do so. Talking is better than forcing, especially when
parents
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and their children stand on different perspectives.
Parents
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should express their suggestions to young
people
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in a peaceful way.
Parents
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need to tell them that they feel lonely without their company and if possible, why not come back to have dinner together. Aspects are different, but blood is the same. When given a reason that cannot be refused, young
people
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wouldn't neglect the needs of elderly
people
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. The gap between
parents
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and children is caused by the development of society. We should reflect on the phenomenon, and solve
this
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problem through conversations between two generations.

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coherence and cohesion
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Your introduction presents a clear opinion on the topic.
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You show understanding of different perspectives between generations.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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