IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should * GDP (Gross Domestic Product) is the total value of goods that are made and services that are provided in a country.

The given chart illustrates the breakdown of total
expenditure
Use synonyms
 spent over 3 years in different
countries
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.
Overall
Linking Words
 it can be observed that Switzerland topped the ranking for all time,
while
Linking Words
 Estonia trailed at the bottom of the period.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
whereas
Linking Words
 most
countries
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 neither increased nor remained stable, Luxembourg and France, Netherlands had a modest decline. Regarding 8
countries
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 where all of them had a change in the proportion of
expenditure
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. In terms of both Denmark's and Norway's
health
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 expenditures, they witnessed a
fimiliar
Correct your spelling
familiar
 trend that began
around
Change preposition
at around
show examples
 8% before increasing and ending at 10%. The opposite trend can be seen in Netherlands and
Luxambourg
Correct your spelling
Luxembourg
 where their
expenditure
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 on
health
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 percentage exhibited a significant reduction, ranging from 10 % and 8%, respectively, to just around 7 to 8%.
While
Linking Words
 France had recognized a dramatic rise in 2007
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
health
Use synonyms
expenditure
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, it still later diminished
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. As the
3remaining
Correct your spelling
3 remaining
countries
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 where
health
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expenditure
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 per cent
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
increased, all of them began and remained
stably
Change the word
stable
show examples
 for
first
Correct article usage
the first
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 two years until sharply surged in the
last
Linking Words
 years, both Denmark and Norway ended at 10%,
while
Linking Words
 there was just 9% in Slovenia. Taking a look at remaining
countries
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 where data of
health
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expenditure
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unchanged
Add a missing verb
was unchanged
show examples
 over the period. The percentage of Witerzland was approximately 11% which
quintuple
Add a missing verb
is quintuple
show examples
 over
than
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 in Estonia. As Belgium and Spain indicated their
expenditure
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 for
health
Use synonyms
 remain stable at 8% and 10%

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to organize your essay with clear paragraphs for each main idea or point.
coherence and cohesion
Use a variety of sentence structures to improve the flow of your writing.
task achievement
Clearly state the main trends and compare the data more effectively.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples with clear data to strengthen your points.
task achievement
The essay identifies the main trends in health expenditure across countries.
task achievement
Some comparisons are made between countries, which shows an understanding of the data.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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