It is neither possible nor useful for a country to provide university places for a high proportion of young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is both impossible and useless for a country to provide a larger percentage of young adults with college
placements
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. I completely disagree with
this
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statement because it is possible
by
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that
show examples
constructing more
colleges
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and
Correct word choice
apply
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useful
as
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for
show examples
young
individuals
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will replace their
elder
Correct your spelling
older
show examples
counterparts in the future.
Government’s
Correct article usage
The government’s
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funding should be directed more towards building
colleges
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.
This
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can be achieved by allocating more funds towards the educational sector rather than investing in less essential areas
such
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as the military wars . By redirecting these funds
in
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to
show examples
building more universities they can increase the
overall
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capacity of the educational system .
This
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way it is possible to accommodate a larger percentage of young
individuals
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with university
placements
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.
For example
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, India has prioritized investing in building a large number of engineering and technical
colleges
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,
instead
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of military expenditure which resulted in a highly educated young population. It is highly beneficial to provide a large proportion of university
placements
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to young
individuals
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. By educating a large number of younger
individuals
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, a country can still maintain its economy by replacing them with
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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aging
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ageing
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workforce across various sectors. Higher education helps
individuals
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gain
necessary
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the necessary
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skills to take over positions from the elderly in key sectors.
For example
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,
Japan’s
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Japan is
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facing a rapid decline in
elderly
Add an article
the elderly
show examples
population which led them to invest in higher education and training
programmes
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programs
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, preparing the youth to step into roles which were previously held by elderly
individuals
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.
This
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not only helped in
smooth
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the smooth
a smooth
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transition of
workforce
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the workforce
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but
also
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helped them
in sustaining
Wrong verb form
sustain
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their economy. In conclusion, constructing more
colleges
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is a viable solution to accommodate a larger proportion of young
individuals
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with college
placements
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and
also
Linking Words
replace their elder counterparts in the future

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to include clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to improve focus and direction.
task achievement
Try to include a wider range of vocabulary to express your points more effectively and make the essay more engaging.
task achievement
Provide more detailed examples or further explanation to strengthen your main points and make them more convincing.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your position on the topic, making it easy for the reader to understand your viewpoint.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples which support your arguments well, showing the positive impact of education on the economy.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
Topic Vocabulary:
  • oversaturation
  • disillusionment
  • vocational training
  • resources
  • funding
  • labor market
  • innovation
  • development
  • mixed approach
  • quality education
  • proportion
  • graduate unemployment
  • overqualification
  • credentials
  • higher education
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