IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram illustrates the proportions of students in Britain who have the ability to speak other languages in addition to English from 2000 to 2010.

The diagram illustrates the proportions of students in Britain who have the ability to speak other languages in addition to English from 2000 to 2010.
the pie charts represent the percentage of UK students at one university in
Englad
Correct your spelling
England
 who
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
can speak
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
Use synonyms
in addition
Linking Words
 to
english
Change the capitalization
English
show examples
, in 2000 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
 in 2000 most of the students
know
Wrong verb form
knew
show examples
 to speak
spanish
Change the capitalization
Spanish
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
 20% of them
do
Wrong verb form
did
show examples
 not have
Correct article usage
a other
show examples
other
Change the wording
another language
other languages
show examples
language
Use synonyms
 than
english
Change the capitalization
English
show examples
,
Linking Words
however
Add the comma(s)
however,
show examples
 students are able to speak
french
Capitalize word
French
show examples
 and other
Use synonyms
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
 are
illustrate
Wrong verb form
illustrated
show examples
 same proportion
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
 is 30%,
also
Linking Words
gemany
Correct your spelling
Germany
 and two other languages has
have
Change the verb form
had
show examples
 the same percentage 15%. In 2010 the number
Change preposition
of student
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
 college who could speak
spanish
Change the capitalization
Spanish
show examples
 and another
language
Use synonyms
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased
5
Change preposition
by 5
show examples
%,
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add the comma(s)
hand,
show examples
 the amount of
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 who
could't
Correct your spelling
couldn't
speak
Change the verb form
speaks
show examples
 any other
language
Use synonyms
has fallen
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
 to
thr
Correct your spelling
the
 half. Germany and two other
Use synonyms
language
Change to a plural noun
languages
show examples
 have
been stayed
Change to the active voice
stayed
show examples
 stable
10
Change preposition
at 10
show examples
% for both years.
furthermore
Linking Words
, french has
jumpped
Correct your spelling
jumped
 5% in 2010.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words language with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportions
  • students
  • speak
  • languages
  • ability
  • English
  • illustrates
  • increase
  • importance
  • multilingualism
  • global
  • reflecting
  • focus
  • historical
  • learning
  • indicating
  • shift
  • educational
  • priorities
  • diversity
  • access
What to do next:
Look at other essays: