IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. You are advised to spend about 20 minutes on this task. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. You are advised to spend about 20 minutes on this task. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The pie graphs illustrate the proportion of
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 for three fields
:
Punctuation problem
:
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 industry, agriculture, and household.
Overall
Linking Words
, agriculture
dominate
Correct subject-verb agreement
dominates
show examples
 the
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 ratio among
six
Correct article usage
the six
show examples
 zones,
while
Linking Words
 household statistics record the lowest proportion across all regions. Examining the agriculture data in detail, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
demonstrate
Correct subject-verb agreement
demonstrates
show examples
 the highest
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 ratio at 88%, which was
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
significant
Replace the word
significantly
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percentage
Correct word choice
higher percentage
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 than other zones. Africa, South East
Asia
Use synonyms
, and South
America
Use synonyms
 show a similar ratio
ranging
Punctuation problem
, ranging
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 from 84% to 71%.
Similarly
Linking Words
, North
America
Use synonyms
 and Europe display
identical
Correct article usage
an identical
show examples
portion
Use synonyms
 at approximately one-third.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, regarding
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
industrial figures, Europe led the
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 category at nearly half (53%), followed by North
America
Use synonyms
 at around 48%.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, other zones maintain uniform distribution at just under 15%, where Central
Asia
Use synonyms
allocate
Correct subject-verb agreement
allocates
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 the lowest budget for
water
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 at 5%.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Household spending on
water
Use synonyms
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
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remain
Correct subject-verb agreement
remains
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 relatively stable at the smallest
portion
Use synonyms
 across all regions.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
Linking Words
While
Fix capitalization
while
show examples
 South
America
Use synonyms
 data represent the largest
portion
Use synonyms
 at around one-fourth, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
 and South East
Asia
Use synonyms
 report the smallest
portion
Use synonyms
 with
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 equivalent part at 7%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, consumption, asia, america, portion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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