In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? why do you think some people might no be happy to give up using cash?

It is true to say that
cash
Use synonyms
flux
Use the right word
flow
show examples
will
be disappared
Wrong verb form
disappear
show examples
in the future and
payment
Use synonyms
method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods
show examples
will be using cards or phones
instead
Linking Words
. I believe
this
Linking Words
kind of
Use synonyms
changes
Fix the agreement mistake
change
show examples
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
some
people
Use synonyms
uncomfortable for
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
of reasons. Credit cards entered our lives more than 20 years
before
Rephrase
ago
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
inovation
Correct your spelling
innovation
offers
people
Use synonyms
to shop more conveniently and
fastly
Replace the word
quickly
show examples
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, other
payment
Use synonyms
methods
including
Punctuation problem
, including
show examples
using mobile
apps
Punctuation problem
apps,
show examples
have been changing the sense of
money
Use synonyms
and
payment
Use synonyms
sharply. Most of the
people
Use synonyms
spend
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
amount of
money
Use synonyms
which is not exist. Needless to say, though
economical
Correct word choice
economic
show examples
situations and high inflation rates
causes
Correct subject-verb agreement
cause
show examples
insufficient
cash
Use synonyms
flow and
people
Use synonyms
have to
do
Verb problem
make
show examples
their
Use synonyms
payment
Fix the agreement mistake
payments
show examples
with virtual
money
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
do not support
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
changes
Use synonyms
at all. Because
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
they think it is not a
healty
Correct your spelling
healthy
way of spending
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
money
Use synonyms
.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
show examples
of
people
Use synonyms
who
thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think
show examples
that way are elderly
ones
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. The reason for that new technology and fast
changes
Use synonyms
bother
Correct subject-verb agreement
bothers
show examples
them and they tend to
adherence
Wrong verb form
adhere to
show examples
their past habits tightly.
According to
Linking Words
Linking Words
last
Correct word choice
the latest
show examples
studies, there are some finance experts who
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
not happy
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
changes
Use synonyms
either. They believe, if
this
Linking Words
situation
grow
Correct subject-verb agreement
grows
show examples
, there will be no
any
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
cash
Use synonyms
even in the banks and
economical
Correct word choice
economic
show examples
problems will deteriorate over the years. In conclusion,
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
of cards and mobile phones for
payment
Use synonyms
will increase
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
cash
Use synonyms
will not be used in
not
Rephrase
apply
show examples
too
distant
Use the right word
not-too-distant
show examples
future.
In addition
Linking Words
, there are some reasons to make
uncomfortable many
Correct word order
many people uncomfortable
show examples
people
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Your introduction presents the topic but may benefit from more clarity in your thesis statement about your opinion. Make your main argument clearer.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use linking words to connect your ideas more smoothly. This can improve the flow of your writing.
task response
Use more specific examples to support your points, as this helps to strengthen your argument.
grammar
Check for small grammatical mistakes and typos which can distract from your message. For example, "disappared" should be "disappeared" and "inovation" should be "innovation."
task response
Try to elaborate further on why elderly people prefer cash and how the changes affect them.
task response
You address the topic and provide some reasoning behind your points, which is a good start.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes the main idea well, giving a clear end to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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