IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might no be happy to give up using cash?

In the upcoming years, paying by
cash
Use synonyms
 may
be no longer
Correct word order
no longer be
show examples
 an available choice. Most
payment
Fix the agreement mistake
payments
show examples
 may be restricted by MasterCard or mobile phones. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 will not appear since old
people
Use synonyms
 prefer
cash
Use synonyms
, and many other
people
Use synonyms
 wouldn't be satisfied giving up their
cash
Use synonyms
 because it's safer than other
methods
Use synonyms
. elderly
people
Use synonyms
 found it easier to deal with
cash
Use synonyms
 because thats what they used to do for a long time, forcing a new method would expose them to many risks,
such
Linking Words
 as fraud, old
people
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 are an easy target for many bad individuals in society, since they trust anyone rapidly,
for example
Linking Words
, they could be ropped by a stranger offered to help them paying with new
methods
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 and steal their credit information for bad purposes. The main reason for
people
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 to be unhappy with
this
Linking Words
 desicion is that loosing some of your money in the street would be a lot more safer than loosing your cards or mobile phones, if thiefs reached to
this
Linking Words
 personal property
this
Linking Words
 would make the stealing proccess a lot more reasier and safer for them , picking up a small card or phone would not attract anyones' attention compared to taking somebody's money in
cash
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,
for example
Linking Words
, in the UK thiefs number increased 45% after
people
Use synonyms
 started using mobile
methods
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 for holding their money. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
 development will not be introduced in the future
due to
Linking Words
preference
Correct article usage
the preference
show examples
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 oldest for their traditional
methods
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, and
this
Linking Words
 would have a negative impact on individuals' safety.

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task
Make your main view clear at the start and keep it steady.
content
Give more reason and a small example for each point.
language
Fix grammar and spell common errors; use correct punctuation.
coherence
Use linking words to join ideas, like also, but, because, so.
structure
End with a short conclusion that repeats your view.
accuracy
Be careful with facts; keep to ideas you can back up.
content
Your idea is easy to see and you tell what you think.
content
You talk about safety and cash use, which is a real thing people care about.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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