IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You recently stayed in a hotel in a large city. The weather was very unusual for tI time of year and the heating/cooling system in the hotel was quite inadequate. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter give details of what was wrong explain what you had to do to overcome the problem at the time say what action you would like the manager to take

Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing to
inform
Verb problem
report
show examples
 an issue that I faced
last
Linking Words
 night in your hotel during my stay because
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
condition
Replace the word
conditioner
show examples
 was not working well, but Sarena
hotel
Fix capitalization
Hotel
show examples
 is famous and situated in a big city
Punctuation problem
, lahore
show examples
lahore
Fix capitalization
Lahore
show examples
. I usually stay at
this
Linking Words
 place during
Correct article usage
the summers
show examples
summers
Fix the agreement mistake
summer
show examples
 for 15 days. The
ambiance
Use the right word
ambience
show examples
 is great and
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
high level
Use the right word
high-level
show examples
 facilities to the guests
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
this
Linking Words
 year they have disappointed me.
Although
Linking Words
 all things are top notch but my
room
Check wording
room's
show examples
ac
Use the right word
AC
show examples
 was
poor
Change preposition
in poor
show examples
 condition and I
can
Wrong verb form
could
show examples
 not sleep at night
due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 problem. I called
numours
Correct your spelling
numerous
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
 to the maintenance department
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 they did not come to solve
this
Linking Words
 problem;
therefore
Linking Words
,
If
Fix capitalization
if
show examples
 you
shifted
Wrong verb form
could shift
show examples
 me to another room,
this
Linking Words
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
 be convenient for me to relax
today night
Use the right word
tonight
show examples
. You should notice
this
Linking Words
 fault and check all the
room
Fix the agreement mistake
rooms
show examples
 on a daily basis
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 if
possible
Punctuation problem
possible,
show examples
 you should hire more
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
 for the convenience. I hope you will take serious action about it. Your faithfully, Rabia Rizwan.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
For task response, say the fault clearly, tell what you did, and say what you want the manager to do. Use short, plain sentences.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, use a new paragraph for each idea: problem, action, request. Use clear links between ideas.
tone
Tone is polite and formal.
format
Opening and closing fit a formal letter.
content
Gives some exact repair details and what you want done.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: