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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selection and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selection and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
This
Linking Words
 chart illustrates the differences in
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 of
electricity
Use synonyms
consumption
Use synonyms
 and
production
Use synonyms
 among
top
Correct article usage
the top
show examples
 ten countries in 2014.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the
number of
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
production
Use synonyms
 and
consumption
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
power in China was more than
9
Change preposition
in 9
show examples
other countries.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Korea, Rep was reported to depict the least number of
production
Use synonyms
 and
consumption
Use synonyms
. China was the
bigger
Correct word choice
biggest
show examples
 producer and consumer of
electricity
Use synonyms
, which produced and consumed around 5.000.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States was in the second place.
Hence
Linking Words
, it generated 4.099
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
electricity
Change preposition
of electricity
show examples
, and used 3.866
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, both items were approximately equal in Russia, which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 about 1.000.
Finally
Linking Words
, in other
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
 the generation and
utilization
Use the right word
utilisation
show examples
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
power was less than 1.000
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 they produced
power more
Correct word order
more power
show examples
 than
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 of the
manufacture
Replace the word
manufacturing
show examples
, people
utilized
Use the right word
utilised
show examples
 more
electricity
Use synonyms
energy
Check wording
apply
show examples
in Germany.
Apart from
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, Korea, Rep showed almost 5.000
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
 in
production
Use synonyms
 and
consumption
Use synonyms
. All in all,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 China was noted to take the first rank, and Korea,
Rep
Check wording
Republic
show examples
 was in the
last
Linking Words
 place in
ranking
Correct article usage
the ranking
show examples
.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, consumption, production, billion, kwh with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • production
  • consumption
  • electricity
  • bar chart
  • countries
  • comparison
  • industrial growth
  • energy demands
  • export
  • efficiency
  • reliance
  • rapid growth
  • significant differences
  • categories
  • domestic use
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