The charts below show the percentages of volunteers by organizations in 2008 and 2014.

The

given

Verb problem

apply

show examples

couple of pie charts below provide the proportion of

volunteers

Use synonyms

by institution between 2008 and 2014.

Overall

Linking Words

,it is apparent that Environmental and Sport established itself as the dominant cohort among other remaining sections throughout the period.

While

Linking Words

these key sectors maintained their leading position,Healthcare gained gradual importance

within

Change preposition

among

show examples

volunteers

Use synonyms

In contrast

Linking Words

,the remainder of

organizations

Change the spelling

organisations

show examples

were preferences which were less chosen by helpers with each passing year. In detail,others accounted for a significant proportion with 15% ,being the crucial key in 2008.

Linking Words

However

Add a comma

However,

show examples

there was

clear

Correct article usage

a clear

show examples

shift with

sharp

Correct article usage

a sharp

show examples

drop to 9% by 2014.

Following

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

sorts

Punctuation problem

, sorts

show examples

such

Linking Words

as educational,art institutions

when

Punctuation problem

, when

show examples

compared with the initial year ,the final figures reveal a downward transformation from 24% and 18% to 17% and 12%.

In contrast

Linking Words

,there was a profound transformation in 2014 compared to 2008.Sport took

Correct article usage

the

show examples

lead among

volunteers

Use synonyms

,boosting

their

Fix the agreement mistake

its

show examples

own proportion to 25% from 15%.

Similarly

Linking Words

,environmental

organizations

Change the spelling

organisations

show examples

ranked second place within dominant cohorts,identifying 29% by 2014.

To sum up

Linking Words

,healthcare was the only sector which represented a surge without

Correct article usage

a dramatical

show examples

dramatical

Replace the word

dramatic

show examples

difference from 7% to 8%. In conclusion,the famous choices between

volunteers

Use synonyms

were environmental and

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

Linking Words

However

Punctuation problem

However,

show examples

other remaining

organizations

Change the spelling

organisations

show examples

underwent some fluctuation by 2014.

In addition

Linking Words

,healthcare represented linear growth.

kokenkazybek0

Oct 8, 2025

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, in contrast".

▼

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.

▼

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words volunteers with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "represented" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

193 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

percentage
proportion
volunteer
organizations
data
trend
increase
decrease
notable
significant
compare
contrast
analyze
highlight
observe
economic
societal
changes
overall
key observations
notably
fluctuate
stable
marked
growth
decline

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The charts below show the percentages of volunteers by organizations in 2008 and 2014.

In some cities, public parks and open spaces are changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do you think the benefits outweigh the disadvantages?

In today's world, people spend a lot of money on appearance because they want to look younger. Why does this happen? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

The debate exists on whether young people should have the freedom to select their own profession or if they should adopt a pragmatic approach, considering their future more seriously. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the past lectures were the traditional method of teaching large numbers of students. Nowadays new technology is increasingly being used to teach students. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this new approach in teaching?

Some people think that the goverment should strictly control the supply of fresh water, as it is a limited resource , while others it should not be regulated. Discuss both the sides and give your opinion