The two graphs demonstrate the proportion of energy resources for USA in 1980 and 1990.

The two graphs demonstrate the
proportion
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of energy resources for
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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in 1980 and 1990. One striking feature is that
,
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apply
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in first chart is superior in oil, natural gas,
while
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second
Correct article usage
the second
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graph
in
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is in
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coal, nuclear
power
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.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
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both of them equally produced hydroelectric
power
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. The
proportion
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of oil
the
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is the
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most
preferd
Correct your spelling
preferred
in
two
Correct article usage
the two
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given
period
Fix the agreement mistake
periods
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,
while
Linking Words
hydroelectric
power
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and nuclear
power
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incidacet the lowest level. 1980 and 1990
leads
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led
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the way in terms of oil with 42% and 33% of energy sources,
Linking Words
accordingly
Rephrase
respectively
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. Both of them
closely
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were closely
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followed by natural gas and coal
with
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, with
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26% and 27%. 1980 and 1990
expends
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expended
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relatively less
proportion
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on nuclear
power
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. 5% and 10%, respectively.
1980 in
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In 1980
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usage
energy
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of energy
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the lowest level of
ratio
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the ratio
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on
Change preposition
of
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hydroelectric
power
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and nuclear
power
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, with 5%. 1990
receives
Wrong verb form
received
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the
fewest
Correct word choice
lowest
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proportion
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of hydroelectric
power
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with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
5%.

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language
Fix the grammar and spelling. Use plain form and short words.
structure
Add a clear intro that says what the charts show and a short conclusion.
data
Use the data carefuly and show how the oil, gas, coal, nuclear and hydro figures compare.
cohesion
Link ideas with how the two charts are the same and how they differ using words like first, second, also and but.
content
You name the main energy types.
data
You use some numbers to back up ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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