IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Sources of energy, England, USA in the 1980s and 1990s.

The pie chart provides data about
origin
Correct article usage
the origin
show examples
 of energy the England and the USA from 1980 to 1990
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen that Oil was the largest category in both periods.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 was the lowest figure in both years. As a pie chart illustrates, Oil was the biggest figure with 42% and 33% source of energy
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 USA and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
England from 1980 to 1990.
Whereas
Linking Words
, the Natural
gas
Use synonyms
 was the
second-large
Use the right word
second-largest
show examples
 category, in
1990
Punctuation problem
1990,
show examples
 the natural
gas
Use synonyms
 was lower than 1 per
cent
Use synonyms
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
 25% of
gas
Use synonyms
 to compare to 1990 the natural
gas
Use synonyms
 was
bigger
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
only
Punctuation problem
, only
show examples
 1 per
cent
Use synonyms
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
 26 % of
gas
Use synonyms
.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the coal was the third-large figure in both periods, in 1980 the coal was with 26 % source of energy compare to in 1990 the coal was higher than with 27 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of
power
Use synonyms
. Turning to the nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 and the Hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 was
the
Use the right word
they
show examples
similar
Verb problem
were similar
show examples
 with 5% and 5% in 1980.
However
Linking Words
, in 1990 the nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 was
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
higher with 10 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of electricity in the USA and England between 1980 and 1990.

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Task approach
Give a clear line at the start that tells what the chart shows.
Data accuracy
Check the numbers in the card carefully and be sure to state them clearly and correctly.
Content
Explain how each energy type changes from 1980 to 1990 for both places in turn.
Language
Use short, plain words and not long, hard lines. Break big sentences in two.
Strength: overview
It has a start that says oil is the main source.
Strength: comparison
It tries to compare the two years for the same type of energy.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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