IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that students should study only science and technology subjects. Others believe that students should also learn other subjects like history and arts. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

5.The study has limitations. In their discussion, the authors say the cause of embryonic death in β1
-AR
Use synonyms
 knockout mice is still unknown. They took it to a possible
a
Correct article usage
apply
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loss of
catecholamines
Fix the agreement mistake
catecholamine
show examples
 synthesis or heart defects. To them, the steady basal heart rate in β1
-AR
Use synonyms
 knockout mice was a sign that other systems are at play
,
Punctuation problem
;
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Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
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 the cause is still in question.
Lastly
Linking Words
, the lack of any β2
-AR
Use synonyms
 response to isoproterenol in β1
-AR
Use synonyms
 knockout mice is yet a gab in cardiac signaling.

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language
The idea is clear, but the writing has many mistakes that can block meaning. Fix basic grammar and use plain words.
structure
Add an intro and a short end. Say what you will talk about, then list the limits, then end with a short idea.
grammar
Some words are not right, like 'gab' should be 'gap' and 'a possible a loss' should be 'a possible loss'. Check small errors.
vocabulary
Use plain words. If you must use a special term, briefly explain it in simple words.
cohesion
Use linking words to join points, like first, next, also, but, because. This helps flow.
content
The topic is clear and the text talks about limits of a study.
content
The paragraph uses real facts about the study, so ideas are tied to the topic.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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