IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The best motivation is money for workers in the workplace. Do you agree or disagree?

There is a debate over
people
Use synonyms
 that
money
Use synonyms
 is a trigger for employees to
work
Use synonyms
 way more passionately. That’s probably true
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 is the main reason why workers
work
Use synonyms
 in workplaces. The main opinions and ideas will be explored in
this
Linking Words
 essay.
Money
Use synonyms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 already become the main purpose of life. Literally everyone is thinking about it.
Money
Use synonyms
 provides
high qualified
Replace the word
a high-quality
show examples
 life.
According to
Linking Words
 the BBC news,
In
Fix capitalization
in
show examples
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
, a large company called Amazon encourages its
employers
Use the right word
employees
show examples
 in order to boost the efficiency of
work
Use synonyms
 and financial income. The executive of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Amazon uses
technique
Correct article usage
a technique
show examples
 that
reward
Correct subject-verb agreement
rewards
show examples
 its workers with
money
Use synonyms
. He knows that if there is encouragement, the staff pushes up all their strengths on the job. And that’s the particular reason why his company is one of the richest
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
 of
work
Use synonyms
. There might be causes that staff do not even care about the
money
Use synonyms
 if the working atmosphere is collaborative and supportive. A minority of
people
Use synonyms
 reckon that
money
Use synonyms
 is nothing, just that the
people
Use synonyms
 who surround them are essential. Another compelling factor is that
people
Use synonyms
 who found their value
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
somewhere
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
try not to lose
this
Linking Words
 opportunity. If bosses or managers are employee-friendly,
money
Use synonyms
 is not necessary
then
Linking Words
. Just a little kindness and respect
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 needed In conclusion,
money
Use synonyms
 is extremely demanding for living happily. In some cases,
people
Use synonyms
, especially
managers
Punctuation problem
managers,
show examples
 should respect
people
Use synonyms
 without ignoring them

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task-response
State your view clearly at the start. If you agree, say I agree that money is a big push to work; if not, say you disagree.
structure
Plan your essay before you write. Use one intro, two body parts for ideas, and a short ending.
coherence
Try to link ideas with simple words like and, but, also, so.
grammar
Use easy grammar. Check forms like money has, not money have.
examples
Give a clear example to show your point. It can be a real or simple made up example.
argument
Idea that money can push workers to work more is clear.
structure
There is a plan with a begin, a body, and an end.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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