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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows the percentage of households with selected electronic goods in New Zealand in 2002 and 2020. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Electronic goods in New Zealand households % of households with 2002 2020 Washing machine 97 98 Color TV 95 99 Computer 50 78 Cell phone 20 80 Video recorder 75 60 Dishwasher 45 55 Digital camera 2 40

The table below shows the percentage of households with selected electronic goods in New Zealand in 2002 and 2020. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Electronic goods in New Zealand households % of households with 2002 2020 Washing machine 97 98 Color TV 95 99 Computer 50 78 Cell phone 20 80 Video recorder 75 60 Dishwasher 45 55 Digital camera 2 40
The given table provides information about how many electronic household goods were in New Zealand in 2002 and 2020. All figures are represented in percentages.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most widespread good in 2002 was
washing
Correct article usage
a washing
show examples
 machine,
stood
Wrong verb form
standing
show examples
 at 97%.
However
Linking Words
, there was the smallest increase
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 only 1%. The lowest indicator had
digital
Correct article usage
a digital
show examples
 camera with 2%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it jumped by 38% in 2020, reaching
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
40%. A closer examination of the data
reveales
Correct your spelling
reveals
 that
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
 TV had approximately the same high indicators as
washing
Correct article usage
the washing
show examples
 machine,
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for 95%.
Then
Linking Words
, it grew to 99%, climbed by only 4%. Computer followed closely by dishwasher, accounted for 50% and 45%
respecrigely
Correct your spelling
respectively
 in 2002. Computer indicators
significatnly
Correct your spelling
significantly
 changed,
reached to
Wrong verb form
reaching
show examples
 78%
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
 dishwasher climbed to only 55%. In comparison with other products,
video
Correct article usage
the video
show examples
 recorder showed a negative trend,
declined
Wrong verb form
declining
show examples
 from 75% in 2002 to 60% in 2020. Cell phone showed the most noticeable growth, rose by 40% from 20% to 80% respectively.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "climbed" was used 2 times.
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