IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The six pie charts illustrate the proportion of
water
Use synonyms
 consumed for industrial, agricultural, and domestic purposes across six areas of the world - North
America
Use synonyms
, South
America
Use synonyms
,
Europe
Use synonyms
,
Africa
Use synonyms
, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
, and South East
Asia
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is notable that agricultural
use
Use synonyms
 makes up the largest share in South
America
Use synonyms
,
Africa
Use synonyms
, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
, and South East
Asia
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 industrial
use
Use synonyms
 is the dominant purpose in North
America
Use synonyms
 and
Europe
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, domestic
use
Use synonyms
 constantly accounts for a small minority of
water
Use synonyms
 used worldwide, except in South
America
Use synonyms
. Looking more closely at the data, more
water
Use synonyms
 is consumed by agriculture than by industry or home in
Africa
Use synonyms
, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
, South East
Asia
Use synonyms
, and South
America
Use synonyms
, at 84%, 88%, 81%, and 71%, respectively.
In contrast
Linking Words
, just under 40% is used in North
America
Use synonyms
 and
Europe
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in North
America
Use synonyms
 and
Europe
Use synonyms
, industrial consumption accounts for 48% and 53% of total
water
Use synonyms
 usage, which is the largest share in these two countries. As for the other areas, industrial
use
Use synonyms
 takes up a smaller proportion, ranging from 5% to 12%.
Such
Linking Words
 dramatic differences are not seen when we compare the figures for domestic
water
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
.
The
Correct article usage
A
show examples
 similar proportion of
water
Use synonyms
 is used in
Africa
Use synonyms
, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
, and South East
Asia
Use synonyms
, at just under 10%,
while
Linking Words
 the figures for North
America
Use synonyms
, South
America
Use synonyms
, and
Europe
Use synonyms
 are higher, at 13%, 19%, and 15%, respectively.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, america, europe, africa, asia, use with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "just under" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • water consumption
  • agricultural, industrial, domestic
  • usage patterns
  • developed vs developing regions
  • irrigation systems
  • climate factors
  • percentage breakdown
  • water management
  • sustainability
  • residential water use
  • efficiency
  • charts comparison
  • water-intensive
  • water scarcity
  • resource allocation
  • desalination
What to do next:
Look at other essays: