IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You have seen an advertisement in an English newspaper for a job working in the City Museum shop during the holidays. You decide to apply for the job. Write a letter to the director of the Museum. In your letter: •introduce yourself •explain what experience and special skills you have •explain why you are interested in the job

Dear Sir, I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you well. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my interest in your museum after seeing an advert in the local newspaper. I am Sam, recently graduated from the college with a degree in
Arts
Correct article usage
the Arts
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 program. I think I will be
the
Correct article usage
a
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 suitable candidate for
this
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 job. I have a helpful nature, and I am already a member of our volunteer drive, which is promoting the education of poor children
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and fulfilling basic necessities of individuals. I can assure you that I will communicate effectively, maintain discipline, and
co-operation
Use the right word
cooperation
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while
Linking Words
 working at your museum I really want to do
this
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 job. Actually, I have a keen interest in learning
traditional
Change preposition
about traditional
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 objects
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and unique items. By working with you, I can not only learn about historical things but
also
Linking Words
 enrich
the
Correct pronoun usage
my
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 confidence level when I
will
Verb problem
apply
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meet others. I hope you will consider my application
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and call me for an interview. I am looking forward to hearing from you soon! Yours faithfully, Sam.

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content
Explain why you fit this shop job with one clear line.
content
Give a short reason for your interest in the museum and a line about what you can do there.
structure
Split the letter into 3 small parts: intro, skills, why you want the job, and closing.
grammar
Use simple words and fix small grammar mistakes to be clearer.
tone
Polite tone and formal closing.
content
Shows you want to learn and work.
content
Mentions volunteer work and care for others.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Dear Director,
  • enthusiastic applicant
  • pursuing a degree in
  • customer service experience
  • volunteer work
  • multilingual
  • cash handling
  • POS systems
  • team player
  • punctual
  • excellent communicator
  • cultural enthusiast
  • part-time position
  • professional references available
  • at your earliest convenience
What to do next:
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