IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Some people think that liking your job is more important than how much money you earn while others think that your salary is more important than how much you like your job. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

I believe that liking your
job
Use synonyms
 is the first step towards getting to know yourself better. We represent
ourself
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
show examples
 with how we interact with other people, act towards them, and make use of our daily life. The main thing to know is how to enjoy liking those challenging jobs that
provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
show examples
 more money. It is certainly better to do a much easier
job
Use synonyms
 with a high salary, but
life making
Use the right word
life-making
show examples
 decisions
comes
Correct subject-verb agreement
come
show examples
 with a higher price.
That is
Linking Words
 why
higher salary
Replace the word
a higher-salaried
show examples
job
Use synonyms
 comes with
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
much higher risks. Albeit getting a
job
Use synonyms
 that you dislike
meaning
Wrong verb form
means
show examples
 those jobs will get
repeatingly
Rephrase
apply
show examples
repetitive.

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task response
The essay does not clearly show both views and your own clear side.
task response
Make a plan: start with an intro that restates the topic, a part for each view, and a clear final line with your view.
coherence
Add more detail to each idea and use simple examples from life or work to back up ideas.
coherence
Use linking words to show compare and contrast (for one side, on the other hand, yet, finally).
grammar
Check grammar: fix small errors like 'oursel f', 'repetingly', and plural with 'jobs' and 'dislike'.
grammar
Keep sentences short and clear so the meaning is easy to see.
content
The writer shows some idea that money and how much you like work can both matter.
concept
The idea of knowing self by job choice is clear.
vocabulary
The use of simple words helps the reader to get the idea.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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