IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart shows the percentage of women and men in one Asian country who passed when they took their driving test between 1980 and 2010.

The chart shows the percentage of people
passed
Correct pronoun usage
who passed
show examples
 their driving
test
Use synonyms
 in both genders,
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
in
Punctuation problem
, in
show examples
 four different years between 1980 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, the number of passed driving tests increased notably before
2010
Punctuation problem
2010,
show examples
 when it dropped in
women
Use synonyms
 and remained stable in
men
Use synonyms
. In 1980,
while
Linking Words
 approximately 48
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
women
Use synonyms
 passed their
test
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1980, just above 30
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
men
Use synonyms
succeed
Wrong verb form
succeeded
show examples
to pass
Change preposition
in passing
show examples
 the evaluation. In the two specific next years (1990 and 2000),
women
Use synonyms
percentages
Check wording
apply
show examples
remained
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
higher
numbers
Check wording
apply
show examples
than
men
Use synonyms
, with 52% and 68% for
women
Use synonyms
 in comparison to 38% and 49% for
men
Use synonyms
. In 2010, still 49% of
men
Use synonyms
 passed the
test
Use synonyms
similar
Punctuation problem
, similar
show examples
 to a decade ago. The only downward trend was seen in
women
Use synonyms
 who passed the
test
Use synonyms
 from 2000 to 2010, dropping sharply from 68% to 65%.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words test, men, women with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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