IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts illustrate four types of destination including part-time work, voluntary work, further study and unemployment that graduate and postgraduate students did after leaving the university in 2008.

the
Fix capitalization
The
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 bar
chars
Use the right word
charts
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provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
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 key information about the
thyes
Correct your spelling
types
 of jobs that
graduate
Use synonyms
 and postgraduate
students
Use synonyms
 did after the university in 2008
, the
Punctuation problem
. The
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 4
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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 of jobs are
part type
Use the right word
part-time
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work
Use synonyms
, voluntary
work
Use synonyms
,
further
Linking Words
 study and unemployment.
the
Fix capitalization
The
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 units are measured in numbers.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph that
further
Linking Words
 study has the largest portion
numbers
Change preposition
of numbers
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 in both
graduate
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
 and postgraduate
students
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
part time
Use the right word
part-time
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 jobs
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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significant
Correct article usage
a significant
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 difference between
graduate
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 and postgraduate
students
Use synonyms
,
around
Change preposition
with around
show examples
 2535 in
graduate
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students
Use synonyms
Linking Words
Correct word choice
and while
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while
Correct your spelling
17735
 in postgraduate
students
Use synonyms
 has 17735.
whereas
Linking Words
unemployment
Replace the word
unemployed
show examples
students
Use synonyms
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
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 around 10
double
Check wording
times more
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 in
graduate
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
than
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postgraduate
Change preposition
in postgraduate
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students
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, voluntary
work
Use synonyms
is
Verb problem
has
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 the lowest number of
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 in both
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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 of
graduated
Replace the word
graduate
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students
Use synonyms
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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dramatically
Correct article usage
a dramatically
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 different number , about 3000
increaseed
Correct your spelling
increased
 number in
graduate
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, we can describe the
graduate
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students
Use synonyms
has
Wrong verb form
as having
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 the best
work
Use synonyms
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
than
show examples
 postgraduate
students
Use synonyms
 from all
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
 of view.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words graduate, students, work with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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