IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The pie charts below show the comparison different kinds of energy production in France in 1995 and 2005.

The pie chart
illustarte
Correct your spelling
illustrates
 the
energy
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 in
france
Fix capitalization
France
show examples
 in
tow
Use the right word
two
show examples
 different periods
1995
Punctuation problem
, 1995
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 and 2005 . And it compares the
diffrence
Correct your spelling
difference
 in
production
Use synonyms
 of gas, petro, coal , nuclear and others .
Linking Words
Overall
Punctuation problem
Overall,
show examples
 the
energy
Use synonyms
 demand increase
with
Change preposition
over
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time ,
also
Linking Words
 the amount of
using
Verb problem
apply
show examples
these products rise
due to
Linking Words
increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 number of people and cars and
Linking Words
also
Rephrase
apply
show examples
industry.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the charts in 1995
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
 that gas was the
highiest
Correct your spelling
highest
 by almost 30 per cent .
Then
Linking Words
,
petro
Fix capitalization
Petro
show examples
 was the second
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 that time by 29 per cent .
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the other hand, in
2005
Punctuation problem
2005,
show examples
 coal
takes
Wrong verb form
took
show examples
 the first place in
production
Use synonyms
 by the french by 30.93 per cent .
As a result
Linking Words
 , gas
becomes
Verb problem
comes
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
second place in
energy
Use synonyms
 with a percentage of 30.31 .
Therefore
Linking Words
, petro is
down graded
Use the right word
downgraded
show examples
 to the third place in
enery manifacturing
Correct your spelling
energy manufacturing
.Nuclear
energy
Use synonyms
 was the lowest in both periods .
At the end
Linking Words
, these changes in
Use synonyms
production
Correct article usage
the production
show examples
 of
energy
Use synonyms
 and other resources are showing us
what
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 source of
energy
Use synonyms
aie
Correct your spelling
is
 important to develop our industries .

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, production with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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