IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Directors of large organizations earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees do. Some people believe it is necessary, but others think that it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your own opinions.

Ex-heads of big corporations
recieve
Correct your spelling
receive
 enormous
moneys
Check wording
amounts
show examples
 compared with common workers. It is popular opinion that it's fair,
whereas
Linking Words
 some individuals consider the opposite. I totally agree with
first
Correct article usage
the first
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 statement for several key reasons. One of the major
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 why
director
Fix the agreement mistake
directors
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 deserve
awesome
Correct article usage
an awesome
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 salary
it's
Verb problem
is that they are
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 responsible
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
all
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
company
Correct word choice
entire company
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. It seems like these
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 do a tiny work, but in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reality
Add a comma
reality,
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 they have a lot of tasks. So, they gain a lot of
strees
Correct your spelling
stress
 and spend even more time than
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
. Another striking argument is that
director
Correct article usage
the director
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 is
basement
Check wording
the basis
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 of
structure
Correct article usage
the structure
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.
For instance
Linking Words
, they always have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
paper work
Use the right word
paperwork
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, meetings with sponsors and
another
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
resposibilities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
. Because of that, very often
happened
Verb problem
apply
show examples
when
director
Correct article usage
a director
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leave
Correct subject-verb agreement
leaves
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company
Correct article usage
the company
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, it
witnessed
Wrong verb form
witnesses
show examples
 a substantial decline. On the other hand, employees do more hard work. So, it can be really unfair, because
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
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 do more
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
should earn more. By the way, in 2022 China increased
maximum
Correct article usage
the maximum
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
working hours,
thousand
Fix the agreement mistake
thousands
show examples
Change preposition
of citizend
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citizend
Correct your spelling
citizens
end
Wrong verb form
ended
show examples
 their
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
 by suicide.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, after
Correct article usage
the goverment
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goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 gave
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bigger salaries,
this
Linking Words
situations
Fix the agreement mistake
situation
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noticebly
Correct your spelling
noticeably
 declined.
in
Fix capitalization
In
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 conclusion, the fact that directors of big corporations have bigger
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
show examples
 than employees is fair. I believe so because of two major reasons: responsibility and
base
Correct article usage
the base
show examples
 of
structure
Correct article usage
the structure
show examples

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. You say your view, but the other side is very short.
task response
Make your ideas more clear. Some points are hard to understand because of grammar and word choice.
task response
Use examples that fit the topic better. The China example is not fully linked to pay for directors.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each body paragraph and explain it step by step.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple linking words well, like First, Also, However, and In conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Check that each sentence connects clearly to the one before it.
task response
You answer the question and give your opinion clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You try to give reasons and an example to support your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • compensation
  • responsibility
  • accountability
  • specialized skills
  • investment
  • income disparity
  • undervalued
  • demotivated
  • excessive compensation
  • misallocation of resources
  • pay ratio
  • motivated workforce
  • financial success
  • performance
  • contribute
What to do next:
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