IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart beòpw gives information on the percentage of British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010.

The graph
illustrate
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrates
show examples
 the percentage of British
people
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 give
moeny
Correct your spelling
money
 to charity in different
age
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
range
Fix the agreement mistake
ranges
show examples
 and between 1990 and 2010. The first element that we can see
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 is the
elevate
Replace the word
elevated
 index of money given to charity by
people
Use synonyms
 in 1990.
People
Use synonyms
 in 1990 in
a
Correct article usage
an
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age
Use synonyms
range
Use synonyms
 between 18 and 50 donated more money to charity than
people
Use synonyms
 in 2010,
Linking Words
however
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 in 2010 in
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
age
Use synonyms
range
Use synonyms
 between 51 and 65+ donated more money than
people
Use synonyms
 in 1990. We can see how the trend changed drastically in the
fist
Use the right word
first
show examples
age
Use synonyms
range
Use synonyms
 18-25
,
Punctuation problem
.
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 We can notice the decrease of donation in 2010. A
treand
Correct your spelling
trend
 that
Linking Words
last
Correct subject-verb agreement
lasts
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 till the
age
Use synonyms
range
Use synonyms
 51-65,
infact
Correct your spelling
in fact
, for the first time we see how
people
Use synonyms
 in 2010 donated almost 10% more
compered
Correct your spelling
compared
 to
people
Use synonyms
 in 1990. Another important data is inside the
age
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range
Use synonyms
 36-50, in
this
Linking Words
case
Add a comma
case,
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people
Use synonyms
 from 1990 donate the 15% more than
people
Use synonyms
 in 2010.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, age, range with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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