Employees sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful, others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

When applying for jobs, it is commonly known that employers often request personal
information
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from job applicants,
such
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as their leisure activities and marital status. Some people believe that
this
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information
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can be relevant and useful in the recruitment process,
while
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others argue that it should not be considered. In
this
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essay, both perspectives will be examined before I explain why I support the latter view.
To begin
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with, those who support asking for personal
information
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have several reasons to justify their stance. One of the most apparent benefits is that
such
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details may help employers understand a candidate’s personality and suitability for a particular role.
In other words
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, hobbies and interests can sometimes indicate qualities
such
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as teamwork, creativity, or leadership.
For instance
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, applicants who participate in team sports may demonstrate stronger cooperation skills, which are valuable in a collaborative workplace.
Furthermore
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, learning about a candidate’s leisure preferences can
also
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offer insight into their sense of responsibility.
For example
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, someone who regularly cooks at home rather than eating out every day may be seen as someone who values planning and commitment—traits that can translate into a responsible approach to work.
However
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, others—including myself—believe that collecting applicants’ personal
information
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can bring about several negative consequences. One major concern is that
such
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information
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may lead to unfair discrimination rather than objective evaluation. Details
such
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as marital status or lifestyle choices are rarely directly related to job performance and may unconsciously influence employers’ decisions.
For example
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, an employer might assume that a married applicant with children would be less flexible with working hours, even though
this
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assumption may be completely unfounded, leading to unjust decision-making. Another significant impact is that gathering private
information
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can result in the loss of truly competent staff. When applicants are asked to disclose personal hobbies or lifestyle details on a form, they may perceive that the company values
such
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irrelevant factors over actual professional capability.
As a result
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, highly qualified candidates may feel disappointed and choose to withdraw from the application process. In conclusion,
although
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some argue that collecting personal
information
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can benefit a company, after weighing both sides carefully, I am strongly convinced that
such
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information
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should be handled with caution. For the sake of fairness, integrity, and the attraction of genuine talent, it is best not to include these requests in the application process.

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task response
Make your main view even more clear in the second body part by linking each idea more directly to the job topic.
task response
Use one or two more very clear real work examples to make your points stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Your ideas are easy to follow, but some long sentences can be split to make the flow even better.
coherence and cohesion
Some link words are good, but do not use too many formal ones in the same way. Try to vary them in a natural way.
task response
You answered all parts of the question and gave your own opinion clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, two body parts, and a strong conclusion.
task response
Each main point is explained well and supported with examples.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are well ordered and easy to follow.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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