IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The table below shows information and predictions regarding the change in percentage of the population aged 65 and above in three countries.

The table provides key information about predictions regarding the change in
popultion
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population
 aged 65 and above in
(
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Canada,
Germany
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 and
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UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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)
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. The units are measured in
percentage
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the table that all of
(
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Germany
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, Canada and
Use synonyms
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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)
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 have increased at above 65 aged population.
In
Linking Words
addition
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addition,
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Germany
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 has the highest
percentage
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 of
people
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 above 65 among those countries,
whereas
Linking Words
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UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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 has the lowest
percentage
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.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown,
Germany
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 has the
highst
Correct your spelling
highest
percentage
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 of
people
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 older than 65 with 20.45% in 1988, 25.32% by 2000 and 30.42% during 2030. Looking at the data more closely,
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UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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 has the lowest
percentage
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 of
people
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 older than 65 with 14.23% in 1988, 14.89% by 2000 and 20.35% during 2030. Turning to the middle range, Canada had 16.32% of
people
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 older than 65 years old in 1988, 20.67% by 2000 and 26.35 during 2030.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words germany, uk, percentage, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage change
  • population
  • aged 65 and above
  • information
  • table
  • data
  • trends
  • patterns
  • comparison
  • predicted
  • future
  • findings
  • comment
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