Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In recent years, there has been an ongoing debate regarding the function of
universities
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. A group of individuals believe there should be
focus
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a focus
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on jobs.
However
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, others believe that
universities
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should focus on
knowledge
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.
Therefore
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, before stating my
opinion
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, both views will be discussed
further
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. Examining the former
opinion
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, the primary argument is that
universities
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must help students find work. Because
cannot
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I cannot
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find a good
job
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after graduation
due to
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high competition in the workplace, leading to
a
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apply
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frustration.
For example
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, people study computer science or engineering to earn a lot of money and secure their
life
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lives
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.
In addition
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, companies
also
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want employees who already
has
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have
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practical skills, which can prevent them from waiting for a long training process.
Therefore
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,
universities
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should be like
job
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tutorials.
However
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, there are people who think
universities
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should be focusing on more of a
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knowledge based
Correct your spelling
knowledge-based
education rather than being
job
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tutorials. The value of the
knowledge
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is the main reason for
this
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type of thinking. These people
belive
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believe
that
the
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apply
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knowledge
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is a binding element for today`s society. A person who is majoring in computer science can earn a living
but
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, but
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without history lessons ,where he can
learns
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learn
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about his heritage ,he cannot feel belonged.
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Hence
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Hence,
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a more inclusive education in
universities
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is needed. In conclusion, there are convincing arguments both for
job
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skills and
knowledge
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. But in my
opinion
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, I certainly favour the former
opinion
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because finding a
job
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is more important for students' future.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. Your view is clear, but each side needs a bit more detail.
task response
Give one clear reason and one clear example for each main idea.
task response
Your opinion is present, but explain why you choose it in a deeper way.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end, which is good.
coherence and cohesion
Some links are clear, but a few sentences do not connect well. Make the steps between ideas easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence form and word order, because some parts are hard to follow.
task response
You discuss both views and give your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has an introduction and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Each body paragraph has one main idea.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Lifelong learning
  • Holistic development
  • Vocational training
  • Industry-specific competencies
  • Critical thinking
  • Creative problem-solving
  • Academic research
  • Intellectual development
  • Ethics and values
  • Societal contribution
  • Job market demands
  • Practical training
  • Internships
  • Knowledge advancement
  • Global challenges
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