IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Write a letter to the manager of the store. In your letter: describe the item you bought explain what problem you found with it say what you would like the manager to do

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I am writing to express my disappointment with the poor service my family and I received during our recent visit to your
restaurant
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. We visited your
restaurant
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 on the evening of 18th May 2026 to celebrate my sister’s birthday.
Although
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 we had heard many positive reviews about your
restaurant
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, our experience was far from satisfactory.
Firstly
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, we had to wait nearly forty minutes for our food despite arriving on time for our reservation.
In addition
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, the meals were served cold, and one of the dishes was completely different from what we had ordered. What disappointed us the most was the behaviour of the staff members, who appeared uninterested and failed to respond politely to our concerns. As
this
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 was a special family occasion, the poor service ruined our celebration and left us extremely dissatisfied. I believe customers should be treated respectfully and served efficiently, especially during important events. I would appreciate it if you could investigate
this
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 matter and provide better training to your staff in order to improve customer service.
Additionally
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, I believe an apology or partial refund would be appropriate considering the inconvenience caused to my family. I look forward to your response and hope your
restaurant
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 will improve its services in the future. Yours faithfully, Ayush Shukla

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task response
Write about a store item, not a restaurant visit. This is the main task problem.
task response
Say clearly what item you bought, what was wrong with it, and what action you want.
coherence and cohesion
Keep each body part on one clear point: item, problem, action.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words like first, next, and finally to make the flow more clear.
task response
Your tone is polite and formal from start to end.
coherence and cohesion
Your ideas are easy to follow and the letter has a clear order.
coherence and cohesion
The closing is correct and fits a formal letter well.
The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

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