IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You recently stayed in a hotel in a large city. The weather was very unusual for the time of year and the heating / cooling system in the hotel was quite inadequate. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter: give details of what went wrong explain what you had to do to overcome the problem at the time say what action you would like the manager to take You do NOT need to write your own address. Begin your letter as follows: Dear ...,

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Dear Manager, I hope you are doing well. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my concern about
the
Correct article usage
my
show examples
 stay at your resort.
Last
Linking Words
 month
on
Punctuation problem
, on
show examples
 25th February, we stayed at your Silver Oak resort for a weekend staycation. At that
time
Punctuation problem
time,
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 the weather was hot and humid
Linking Words
due
Punctuation problem
, due
show examples
 to which we were not able to explore
outdoor
Correct article usage
the outdoor
show examples
 pool and excursions
Linking Words
as
Punctuation problem
; as
show examples
 a
result
Punctuation problem
result,
show examples
 we ended up staying in our hotel rooms.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 the experience turned sour
due to
Linking Words
 the cooling issues in the room. When we expressed
the receptionist about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
our problem
, she
Change preposition
to the receptionist, she
show examples
 was arrogant and had no intention of helping us. She dismissively said that
due to
Linking Words
bad
Correct article usage
the bad
show examples
 weather and
weekend
Correct article usage
the weekend
show examples
, they do not have maintanance worker to repair the air conditioner. We requested to provide us with another accomodation but she refused to hear us.
As a
Linking Words
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
 we had to buy the portable fan from the local stores
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 she refused to compensate for that as well. Later
on
Add a comma
on,
show examples
 we had to change our hotel
due to
Linking Words
 constant cooling issues. As a
manager
Add a comma
manager,
show examples
 you should take accountability
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the behaviour of your employee
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 she should be reprimanded for her behaviour. I believe you should consider keeping an emergency
maintance
Correct your spelling
maintenance
 worker on weekends that would help to resolve any client's issues that
arises
Correct subject-verb agreement
arise
show examples
 in future during the weekends. Sincerely, Kl

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task response
Say the problem more clearly at the start. Tell what was wrong with the room in a direct way.
task response
Explain a bit more about what you did at that time, step by step, so the reader can follow it easily.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words like 'first', 'then', and 'finally' to make the letter flow better.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one main point in each paragraph. This will make your ideas easier to read.
task response
Use a more polite formal tone, for example 'I would appreciate it if you could...'
task response
You answered all parts of the task: the problem, what you did, and what action you want.
coherence and cohesion
The letter has a clear opening and ending.
coherence and cohesion
Your ideas are mostly easy to follow in time order.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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