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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph below shows the oil production and consumption in China between 1982 and 2006. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The line graph compares the total sum of
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
 per
day
Use synonyms
 between Consumption and
Production
Use synonyms
 from
China
Use synonyms
 between 1982 and 2006.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Oil
Use synonyms
 usage had an upward trend despite being lower than
oil
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 without any drops over the course. Meanwhile,
Oil
Use synonyms
Production
Use synonyms
 remained stable across the period but
overall
Linking Words
 managed to increase the rate of
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
. In 1982,
China
Use synonyms
's
oil
Use synonyms
 use started with almost 2
million
Use synonyms
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
 per
day
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 amount stayed the same from 1986
but stopped at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 1990. A significant increase was seen
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1994 with an
oil
Use synonyms
 consumption of 3.5
millon
Correct your spelling
million
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
 per
day
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 trend of boost still continued throughout the years.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
oil
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 was accumulated by 4
million
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
 in 1998.
This
Linking Words
 was
then
Linking Words
 rised at 5
million
Use synonyms
 in 2002.
Finally
Linking Words
, over 6
million
Use synonyms
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
 were consumed in 2006. For the
oil
Use synonyms
 obtained in 1982, it was above 2
millon
Correct your spelling
million
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
Correct pronoun usage
, which
show examples
that is
Linking Words
 almost similar to the starting point of
oil
Use synonyms
 consumption. After that, the
oil
Use synonyms
 output of
Use synonyms
china
Fix capitalization
China
show examples
 grew
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 3
million
Use synonyms
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
 in 1986.
However
Linking Words
, from 1986 to 1994,
production
Use synonyms
 had no changes and was constant at 3
million
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 trend was broken in 1998,
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
China
Use synonyms
 produced a margin between 3
million
Use synonyms
to
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 3.3
million
Use synonyms
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
 per
day
Use synonyms
.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
oil
Use synonyms
creation
Check wording
production
show examples
 in 2006 reached 3.5
million
Use synonyms
oil
Use synonyms
barrels
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words oil, barrels, day, production, china, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • oil production
  • oil consumption
  • gradual increase
  • surpass
  • overtake
  • reliance on imports
  • disparity
  • steady rise
  • growing gap
  • significant
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