IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart below give information on the percentage of British people giveing money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

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The bar chart
compare
Correct subject-verb agreement
compares
show examples
 five
difference
Replace the word
different
age
Use synonyms
 groups from
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom who
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
donated money to a charity by percentages between a year of 1990
and
Change preposition
to
show examples
 2010 by the range.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
calss
Correct your spelling
class
 of 36 - 50 was highest
from
Check wording
rate from
show examples
 the information which is has been given in 1990.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
 group
of
Verb problem
is
show examples
 18 - 25.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in 2010 biggest donating are 36
years
Use synonyms
 old to 65
years
Use synonyms
above
Correct word choice
old
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
,
smallest
Correct article usage
the smallest
show examples
 is 18-25
years
Use synonyms
pld
Correct your spelling
old
.
Frist
Correct your spelling
First
 of all, a group
36
Change preposition
of 36
show examples
-50
years
Use synonyms
ld
Correct your spelling
old
 was given 42 per
cent
Use synonyms
is
Correct pronoun usage
, which is
show examples
 the highest, 35 per
cent
Use synonyms
were has been
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 donated by the gang of 51-65. And, 32 per
cent
Use synonyms
 by two classes between 26 -35 and 65
above
Correct word choice
and above
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, 17 per
cent
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the youngest class.
By contrast
Linking Words
, accounted at 39 per
cent
Use synonyms
 in the 51 -65
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 group in 2010
was
Correct pronoun usage
, which was
show examples
record
Correct article usage
a record
show examples
on top point
Correct word choice
high
show examples
. 35 per
cent
Use synonyms
 by 36 - 51
nad
Correct your spelling
and
 65
years
Use synonyms
 old
above
Correct word choice
and above
show examples
 were second
pointed
Replace the word
point
 of
this
Linking Words
Use synonyms
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
show examples
. Meanwhile, 24 per
cent
Use synonyms
by
Verb problem
are aged
show examples
 26-35
years
Use synonyms
 old of
age
Use synonyms
.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
 of 18-25
shown
Verb problem
is shown
show examples
 as 16
perc
Correct your spelling
per
cent
Use synonyms
.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, years, cent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • charitable donations
  • age range/bracket/group
  • percentage (%)
  • 20-year period
  • British people
  • trends
  • increase/decrease
  • significant change
  • donation patterns
  • remained stable
  • highest/lowest
  • observe
  • compare
  • summarize
  • comment on
  • relevant features
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