In many countries women are allowed to take maternity leave from their jobs during the first months after the birth of their baby. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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In some nations, parental leave is a constitutional right for
women
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who have given birth during the first months after their babies are born.
While
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it has some downsides, for parents and their
baby's
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babies'
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health, the upside,
such
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as preserving their health and lowering their
stress
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levels
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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is fueled by their jobs, can be far greater than reducing their chances of being hired because of
potential
Correct article usage
a potential
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career gap.
This
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essay will elaborate on both advantages and disadvantages. On the one hand, one of the advantages of taking parental leave for
women
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is that
work
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life is a catalyst, causing high
stress
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levels and the possibility of catching an illness.
This
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is because
women
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have to go to
work
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every day
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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they are exposed to a high workload, forcing them to complete their tasks simultaneously
while
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they are trying to care for their
child
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. These multitasks cause an increase in their
stress
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level and
trigger
Verb problem
lead
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to feeling fatigue.
For instance
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, if
women
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have to join an
in person
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in-person
meeting
during the time of
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while
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feeding their
child
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;
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,
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as a result
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, they
loose
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lose
show examples
their attention for the meeting.
Therefore
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, they feel insufficient not only for
works
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work
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but
also
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for their
child
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, leading to
augmenting
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augmented
stress
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levels.
In addition
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, increasingly
women
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use public transport, leading them to
caught
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catch
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easily an ilnnes particularly in the winter.
Thus
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, there is a strong link between parental leave and well-being because they capture the synergies
each
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with each
show examples
other.
On the other hand
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, one of the drawbacks of parental leave is that
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this
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these
show examples
career gaps
leads
Correct subject-verb agreement
lead
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to
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
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their
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in their
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chances of being hired by a company. The reason is that comapnies seeking a person who can
work
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in
a
Correct article usage
the
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long term without any probability of leaving or missing
the working days
Replace the word
workdays
. Given that reason, they see a woman who can potentially leave the job
due to
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maternity leave after
they give
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she gives
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birth. To illustrate, there is a general belief that some companies prefer male managers for leading positions because they think that these men can
work
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full-time and they don't need any extra
off
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apply
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days
like
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off like
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women
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.
Therefore
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,
women
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's chances increasingly decrease against
men
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male
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employees. In conclusion,
although
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taking maternity leave has some downsides, I firmly maintain that
this
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career gap
provide
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provides
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a significant number of opportunities for parents, allowing them to spend more time on taking care of their
child
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and keep
safe their homes
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their homes safe
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from any illness.

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coherence cohesion
Make your main idea more clear in each body part.
coherence cohesion
Use shorter sentences to make links easier to follow.
task achievement
Add one clear example for each main point.
task achievement
Explain why the good side is stronger in a more direct way.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You answer both sides of the question.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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