IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefer You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Get started →
Accommodation Officer 13, Kings Road Edinburgh Dear Sir, Dear Madam, I am writing
you
Change preposition
to you
show examples
 to express my dissatisfaction with my
Use synonyms
room mate
Correct your spelling
roommate
 and request
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
another accommodation next term. My main problem is that I cannot study in my
room
Use synonyms
 because my
Use synonyms
room-mate
Correct your spelling
roommate
 always has friends visiting. He
also
Linking Words
 has parties, which usually
ends
Correct subject-verb agreement
end
show examples
 early in the morning, several times a week.
Linking Words
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
show examples
 he often borrows my things without asking me. I cannot accept
this
Linking Words
 situation any longer. Especially because I have very
imporant
Correct your spelling
important
 exams next term and I really must study hard.
This
Linking Words
 is why I would be very grateful if I could have another
room
Use synonyms
 next term. It would be most convenient for me if I
haden't
Correct your spelling
didn't
to
Verb problem
have to
show examples
 share my
room
Use synonyms
 with somebody else. I am looking forward to
hear
Wrong verb form
hearing
show examples
 from you soon.
yours
Capitalize the word
Yours
show examples
 faithfully, Anja Schweizer

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

greeting and closing
Say Dear Sir or Madam, not both forms together.
coherence cohesion
Add one short end line before the close, like I hope you can help me.
complete response
Say what room you want in a more clear way, for example a single quiet room.
suitable writing tone
Use a more formal tone, for example request a change of room instead of say dissatisfaction with my room mate.
single idea per paragraph
Keep one main idea in each part: problem, why study is hard, and what you want.
complete response
You answer all three bullet points.
logical structure
Your ideas are easy to follow.
task achievement
You give clear reasons why work is hard.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: