IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You recently bought a large expensive item but when it was delivered to your home you found some problems with it. Write a letter to the manager of the shop. In your letter - give details of what you bought - describe the problems with your item - say what you want the shop to do You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

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Dear Sir or Madam I feel I must express my disappointment. I have received a new air conditioning
system
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 has
heating
Correct article usage
a heating
show examples
system
Use synonyms
 as well. It is a new design
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 year,
convenient
Change preposition
with a convenient
show examples
 button function, and
can
Correct pronoun usage
it can
show examples
fix
Wrong verb form
be fixed
show examples
 on the wall. When I received
, I
Correct pronoun usage
it, I
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 was absolutely delighted.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
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 I was using
for
Correct pronoun usage
it for
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 3 nights.
Unfortunately
Add a comma
Unfortunately,
show examples
 I found some problems with it.
Firstly
Linking Words
 If I switch it on
it
Punctuation problem
, it
show examples
 was
such
Linking Words
 a big
noisy
Replace the word
noise
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, as we all know nowadays very cold
.
Rephrase
nowadays.
show examples
Linking Words
Thus
Punctuation problem
Thus,
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 I bought
this
Linking Words
 incredibly heating
system
Use synonyms
doesn't
Correct word choice
, but it doesn't
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working
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
.
if
Capitalize the word
If
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 I turn on the heating switch only
blew
Wrong verb form
blows
show examples
 the cold wind.
Linking Words
Consequently
Add a comma
Consequently,
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 I couldn't sleep
over
Rephrase
apply
show examples
very well.
In addition
Linking Words
, I had ordered marvelous violet colour.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 I received
fair
Correct article usage
a fair
show examples
 beige colour.
it
Capitalize the word
It
show examples
 was quite
unbalance
Replace the word
unbalanced
 with my
furnitures
Check wording
furniture
show examples
. I am still very
upsetting
Correct word choice
upset
show examples
. I think
that is
Linking Words
 not
reasonable
Correct article usage
a reasonable
show examples
 cost. I paid over £2000. I think you would consider
to give
Wrong verb form
giving
show examples
 me
discount
Correct article usage
a discount
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
if I go to your shop again. And Changing the another air
conditiong
Correct your spelling
conditioning
system
Use synonyms
 and heating
system
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is violet colour
as
Punctuation problem
, as
show examples
 soon as possible. I look forward to hearing from you shortly Yours faithfully

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task response
For task response, you answer all parts, but make your asks more clear: ask for a new item or full money back.
task response
For task response, use a more formal tone. Do not use words like 'marvelous' here. Keep the style calm and clear.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, put each main point in its own part: what you bought, what is wrong, what you want.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, link ideas with simple words like 'First', 'Also', 'Because of this', and 'Therefore'.
task response
For task response, you gave clear facts about the item, the price, and the problems.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, you used a clear start and end for a formal letter.
Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

  • A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
  • The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
  • A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

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