IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Many small businesses are being forced to close because they are unable to compete with multinational corporations. What problems does this cause and how can those problems be solved?

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There is no denying the fact that small
businesses
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 are not able to beat multinational corporations.
This
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 essay will will dicuss how to solve
close
Correct word choice
apply
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small
businesses
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it causes
to
Check wording
businesses to
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think
Verb problem
apply
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stop
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apply
show examples
businesses
Use synonyms
.
To begin
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 with, there are many
people
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want
Correct pronoun usage
who want
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 to understand
for
Change preposition
how to
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 stop small
businesses
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.
Firstly
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,
The
Fix capitalization
the
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 government should support
small
Correct article usage
a small
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 group of
people
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.
Linking Words
in
Capitalize the word
In
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 other words, a few
people
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 do not hold resources
such
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 as bill water , electroincs and employees, it can be complicated
to
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for
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 young
people
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.
Linking Words
in
Capitalize the word
In
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 addition, it problems from economic growth
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it may
Verb problem
be
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the high cost of living.
Linking Words
for
Capitalize the word
For
show examples
 example,
people
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 do not have a lot of money to help small
businesses
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 and tend to close early project. s

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task response
Score: 4. Your answer does not fully answer both parts of the question. You need to explain the problems caused by small business closures, then give ways to solve them.
task response
Write clear ideas. Problems can include job loss, less choice for people, and less money in local towns. Solutions can include lower tax, small loans, and help with rent or bills.
task response
Your example is not clear enough. Give one simple example: if a local shop closes, workers may lose their jobs and the town may have fewer shops.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 4. The essay has an opening and one main paragraph, but it ends too soon. Add a second body paragraph and a short ending.
coherence and cohesion
Use a simple plan: opening; problems; solutions; ending. Keep one main idea in each paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to understand, for example: “This essay will will dicuss how to solve close small businesses”. Write: “This essay will discuss the problems caused by small business closures and how to solve them.”
coherence and cohesion
Check full stops, capital letters, and spaces. For example, write “Firstly, the government...” and “For example, people...”
task response
You have a clear main topic: small businesses close because they cannot compete with big companies.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words, such as “To begin with”, “Firstly”, “In other words”, “In addition”, and “For example”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • community character
  • multinational corporations
  • economic decline
  • monopoly
  • tax incentives
  • grants
  • buy local campaigns
  • niche products
  • personalized services
  • economic ecosystem
  • business partnerships
  • competitive advantage
  • consumer choice
  • market diversity
  • entrepreneurial spirit
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