IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You have a full-time job and you are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. Write a letter to your teachers. In your letter describe the situation explain why you cannot continue at this time say what action you would like to take

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Dear Mr
Mcpaul
Capitalize the proper name
McPaul
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, I hope you have been doing well. My name is Taylor
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I am writing to inform I will
be no longer
Correct word order
no longer be
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 able to continue the
course
Use synonyms
which
Change preposition
in which
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 I am currently enrolled
in
Change preposition
apply
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because of my full-time job. I have taken
part-time
Correct article usage
a part-time
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 evening
course
Use synonyms
 to learn
play
Verb problem
to play
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 musical instruments as I find it relaxing
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I wanted to hone my skills in it.
However
Linking Words
, I have been recently promoted in my full-time job
which
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, which
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 includes more responsibilities, and I have to extend my working hours
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, due
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due to which
Correct word choice
so
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 I cannot be able to continue
part-time
Correct determiner usage
my part-time
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course
Use synonyms
 at
this
Linking Words
 moment. My field job working hours would be 9 AM to 6 PM for four more months
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I need
sometime
Check wording
some time
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 to complete my daily chores
which
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, which
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 is why I decided to drop out
from
Change preposition
of
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 my evening
course
Use synonyms
 for some months. Meanwhile, I would request you to help me with
a
Correct article usage
the
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 refund process
or
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, or
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 if
possible
Punctuation problem
possible,
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 could you schedule classes on weekends so that I can be able to continue
this
Linking Words
course
Use synonyms
. I would appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
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 you
consider
Verb problem
could consider
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 my request and help me with either
refund
Correct article usage
the refund
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 process or scheduling classes on weekends. Looking forward to hearing back. Yours faithfully, Taylor

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task response
Score: 6. Give a more clear first line: say that you must stop the course for now. Also, choose one main action: ask for a refund or ask to move to a weekend class. This will make your request more clear.
coherence and cohesion
Score: 6. Keep one main point in each part. Put your job change in one part, why it stops the course in the next, and your request in the last. Use simple links such as 'However', 'Therefore', and 'If possible'.
task response
Use more natural forms: 'I have taken a part-time evening course to learn to play musical instruments.' Say 'I cannot continue the course' instead of 'I cannot be able to continue part-time course.'
coherence and cohesion
Do not repeat 'refund process' and 'weekend classes' in the last two parts. State the request once, then end the letter.
task response
You answer all three parts: you tell the reason, say why you must stop, and ask for a refund or weekend class.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear start, a main part, a request, and a polite end.
task response
The tone is polite and right for a letter to a teacher.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • full-time employment
  • part-time evening course
  • increased workload
  • longer working hours
  • urgent deadlines
  • work commitments
  • attend classes regularly
  • keep up with coursework
  • complete assignments on time
  • poor attendance
  • temporary leave
  • defer my studies
  • resume the course
  • next available intake
  • transfer to another class
  • online learning option
  • refund for the remaining fees
  • I sincerely apologise for the inconvenience
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