Some educationalists argue that non-exam, arts-based subjects, such as music, drama, art and craft, should be compulsory in the secondary-school curriculum. They believe that activities such as these can improve overall academic performance. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction

The issue of non-exam subjects is of great concern to the general public. There is an assertion that these arts-based disciplines should be changed into compulsory subjects in the secondary-school curriculum to improve all-around academic

performance

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Nevertheless

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, I would say

this

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claim is problematic

and

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, and

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the relevant reasons will be elaborated as follows.

Body paragraph 1

On the one hand, it is not difficult to understand why some argue

those

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that those

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arts-based

subjedts

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subjects

should be compulsory in junior school and senior school curriculum. From

this

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perspective,

shcools

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schools

should not only cultivate

students

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' academic competence but

also

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art talent to help them become all-around

students

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Therefore

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, some people jump to the conclusion that

secondary-schools

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secondary schools

should

put

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make

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the arts-based discipline

into

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apply

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compulsory.

Body paragraph 2

Plausible though the above logic seems, I will consider it illogical to force all secondary

students

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to study

arts

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the arts

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. The advocates of the claim in the topic are oblivious to the irrelevant connection between the premise and conclusion in their

logic-improving

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logic; improving

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academic

performance

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does not hinge exclusively on making the arts-based classes compulsory;

by contrast

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, the justification of improving academic

performance

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depends on various determining factors.

Additionally

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, if the secondary

students

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are pushed to study arts, they will have

not else

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no other

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energy to study academic courses. In

this

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case, the

academmic

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academic

performance

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will be worse.

Conclusion

To summarise,

fromm

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from

what has been discussed above,

altough

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although

some people say that arts-based

couses

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courses

should be changed into compulsory ones, it is my conclusion that these classes should be

oppotional

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optional

instead

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compusory

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compulsory

asllchkied

Sep 7, 2026

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task response

State your view more clearly in the first paragraph. Say that you disagree because art classes may help some students, but they should not be required for all.

task response

Explain the main idea more fully. The essay says art takes time from school work, but it does not show why this will happen or how it may affect students.

task response

Use one clear example. For example, a student who needs more time for maths or science may feel too much stress if art is also required.

task response

Do not only say that the other view is wrong. Show that you understand it: music, drama, and art can help students feel calm, work with others, and think in new ways.

coherence and cohesion

Use a simpler plan: first paragraph give your view; next paragraph explain the good side; then explain why you still disagree; last paragraph repeat your main view.

coherence and cohesion

Make each paragraph focus on one main point. The first main paragraph now repeats the topic but does not develop a reason.

coherence and cohesion

Use clear links between ideas, such as “However”, “For example”, “As a result”, and “In my view”. Avoid long sentences with many ideas joined together.

coherence and cohesion

Check unclear word groups. Write “make arts-based subjects compulsory”, not “put the arts-based discipline into compulsory”.

coherence and cohesion

Check spelling carefully: “subjects”, “schools”, “academic”, “from”, “although”, “courses”, “optional”, and “compulsory”.

task response

You give a clear final view that arts-based classes should be optional, not required.

task response

You try to discuss both sides before giving your own view.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a beginning, main paragraphs, and an ending.

coherence and cohesion

You use some useful linking words, such as “On the one hand”, “Additionally”, and “To summarise”.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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