IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You took your family to a nearby restaurant. You were disappointed with the meal and wish to complain to the manager. Write a letter to the manager of the restaurant. In the letter: explain why you were at the restaurant describe the problems write about the action you want the manager to take

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Dear Manager, Hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you well. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my dissatisfaction regarding the service I
recieved
Correct your spelling
received
 at your restaurant
last
Linking Words
 week. As
last
Linking Words
 week was my birthday
so
Correct word choice
,
show examples
 we
did
Verb problem
made
show examples
 our reservation for 3 tables
last
Linking Words
 week for my birthday party .
we choose
Wrong verb form
We chose
show examples
 your property because of
location
Correct article usage
the location
show examples
 conveinence as your restaurant is near
by
Change preposition
the
show examples
 bus
staion and
Correct word order
station and has a
show examples
 good rating at google review . The problem I faced during my visit was ingredient used in our dishes
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 not properly mixed
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, due
show examples
due to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which we cannot able to eat our
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
food . I ordered butter chicken
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it was too salty and spicy
as
Punctuation problem
. While
show examples
while
Linking Words
 ordering
I
Punctuation problem
, I
show examples
clearly
mention
Wrong verb form
mentioned
show examples
 all our items
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
 be mild in spices
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 your co- worker donot listen properly and honour our words.
Last
Linking Words
 but not least , as we are your loyal customer
from
Change preposition
for the
show examples
last
Linking Words
 5
years
Punctuation problem
years,
show examples
 I would suggest
you
Correct word choice
that you
show examples
to
Wrong verb form
apply
show examples
refund our 100% bill as we
donot
Correct your spelling
did not
 enjoy our meal and
advice
Replace the word
advise
 you to give some additional training to your employees so that
this
Linking Words
 problem cannot be
repeat
Wrong verb form
repeated
show examples
 next time for
another
Correct determiner usage
other
show examples
 customers. Looking forward to hearing back from
your side
Correct pronoun usage
you
show examples
 with a positive and prompt response
from your side,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 With regards, Navdeep

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
You cover all parts of the task: why you went, what went wrong, and what you want the manager to do. Add key facts, such as the date, the number of people, and how the bad meal affected your family.
task response
Make your request clear and fair. Ask for a full refund, staff training, and a reply within a set time. Keep the focus on the meal and service.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear paragraph order: reason for writing, reason for the visit, problems, and requested action. This will make the letter easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words more carefully, such as “However”, “In addition”, “Therefore”, and “As a result”. Do not repeat “last week” or “from your side” many times.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one main point in each paragraph. Put the food problem in one paragraph and the staff problem in another paragraph.
tone
Use a more formal style. For example, write “I am writing to complain about...” rather than “Hope this letter finds you well.” Avoid phrases such as “your co-worker” and use “a member of staff” instead.
task response
You clearly explain that the visit was for your birthday party and that you chose the restaurant because it was near the bus station and had good reviews.
task response
You give a clear example of the problem: the butter chicken was too salty and spicy, even though you asked for mild food.
coherence and cohesion
The letter has a clear opening, body paragraphs, and a closing. Your request for a refund and staff training is easy to find.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • disappointed
  • meal
  • complain
  • manager
  • occasion
  • celebration
  • dining experience
  • undercooked
  • cold
  • unseasoned
  • advertised
  • menu
  • poor service
  • cleanliness
  • resolution
  • refund
  • replacement
  • discount
  • customer satisfaction
What to do next:
Look at other essays: