IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

You are planning to stay at a hotel for a few days and would like to know more about the accommodation. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter: * ask for information about the types of rooms available and their prices * ask about the facilities provided by the hotel * ask about any other services available for guests

4.0 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Dear Sir or Madam, I am looking to stay at your hotel. So, I would like to know information about rooms and other facilities. First of all, could you provide me list of types
rooms
Change preposition
of rooms
show examples
 available? I would
also
Linking Words
 like to know
price
Correct article usage
the price
show examples
,
discount
Correct article usage
the discount
show examples
 for long stay for guests, and the
wide
Replace the word
width
 of rooms.
Secondly
Linking Words
, I would
to
Verb problem
like to
show examples
 know
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
whether the booking includes breakfast , Wi-Fi, and
swimming
Correct article usage
a swimming
show examples
 pool.
Finally
Linking Words
, I would like to know other facilities
availability
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
for example
Linking Words
, airport transport. Because it is so important to me. Yours faithfully, Saif

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ask for the room types, prices, room size, and long-stay price in full sentences. Also ask about more guest services, not only airport transport.
task response
Use a more polite formal style. For example: “Could you please tell me whether breakfast is included?”
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear order: rooms, hotel facilities, then other services. Keep this plan.
coherence and cohesion
Make each paragraph a little more complete. Use links such as “In addition” and “Finally” to join your questions clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence form and word order. For example, write “a list of available room types” and “the size of the rooms.”
task response
You ask about all the main areas: rooms, hotel facilities, and airport transport.
coherence and cohesion
The greeting and closing are suitable for a formal letter, and the three main paragraphs are easy to follow.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: