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Band 7

The chart below shows the average amount of time per day spent on two common leisure activities by people in different age groups in New Zealand.

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The chart below shows the average amount of time per day spent on two common leisure activities by people in different age groups in New Zealand.
The two bar charts illustrate the average amount of
time
Use synonyms
 per day that
people
Use synonyms
 in different
age
Use synonyms
 groups in New Zealand spent reading for pleasure and listening to
music
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, older
people
Use synonyms
 spent more
time
Use synonyms
 reading for pleasure,
wherea
Correct your spelling
whereas
 younger
people
Use synonyms
 generally spent more
time
Use synonyms
 listening to
music
Use synonyms
.
People
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age
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 56–65+ recorded the highest reading
time
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,
while
Linking Words
 the 14–24
age
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group
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 spent the most
time
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 listening to
music
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. The amount of
time
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spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 reading for pleasure
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
 with
age
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.
People
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Use synonyms
age
Replace the word
aged
 14–24 spend around 20
minutes
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 per day reading, compared with 35
minutes
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 for those aged 25–32 and 45
minutes
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 for the 33–42
group
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. The figure
then
Linking Words
 rose to 50
minutes
Use synonyms
 among
people
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 aged 43–53 and 70
minutes
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 for the oldest
group
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
, listening to
music
Use synonyms
 was most popular among the youngest
group
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, at approximately 80
minutes
Use synonyms
 per day.
This
Linking Words
 figure fell to 60
minutes
Use synonyms
 for those aged 25–32 and 45
minutes
Use synonyms
 for the 33–42
group
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. It
then
Linking Words
 increased to 50
minutes
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 and 75
minutes
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 for the two oldest groups.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words time, people, age, music, group, minutes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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