IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the numbers of male and female research students studying six science-related subjects at a UK university in 2009. summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

5.5 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
The chart below shows the numbers of male and female research students studying six science-related subjects at a UK university in 2009. summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar chart gives the number of male and female
research
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
 in related subjects in the United Kingdom
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 in 2009.
Overall
Linking Words
, biology had the highest number of
research
Use synonyms
 subjects for both genders,
while
Linking Words
 physics had the widest gap between females and males. Biology had the highest number of
research
Use synonyms
 subjects with around 240,
while
Linking Words
 female
students
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 had only 200
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
research
Use synonyms
 subject, in physics , male
students
Use synonyms
 had slightly above 200, which means physics is the second highest
research
Use synonyms
 subject.
while
Linking Words
 female
students
Use synonyms
 had just below 50,
On the other hand
Linking Words
, astronomy man student had 150, compared with women, more than 50, in geology respactively similrty had 150, and women had just over 50, In Medicine, men had 200
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
research
Use synonyms
subject
Check wording
subjects
show examples
while
Linking Words
 women had slightly under 200. In veterinary medicine male had around 100,
while
Linking Words
 females had 200,

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words research, students with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • chart
  • number
  • male
  • female
  • research
  • students
  • subjects
  • total
  • overall
  • significantly
  • higher
  • compared
  • indicating
  • gap
  • exception
  • balanced
  • representation
  • preference
  • attract
  • disciplines
  • data
  • suggests
What to do next:
Look at other essays: