The best way to solve traffic and transportation problems is to encourage people to move in cities from suburbs and countryside’s areas. Do you agree and disagree?

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Introduction
It is often argued that the best method to reduce
traffic
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congestion and transportation problems is to motivate residents from the countryside and suburban
areas
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to move to cities. I entirely disagree with
this
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point of view because when a large proportion of
people
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move to urban
areas
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,
this
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can result in an
increase
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in air pollution, worsen
traffic
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congestion and
also
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put a burden on public infrastructure.
Body paragraph 1
The primary reason why I disagree with
this
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view is that when a large number of individuals relocate to urban
areas
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,
this
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leads to an
increase
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in air pollution and more difficulties in
traffic
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.
This
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is mainly because more residents use vehicles
for going
Wrong verb form
to go
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to their offices and universities.
As a result
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, more fuel and diesel are used and of course, more
traffic
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during the peak hours. A good illustration of
this
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is that an
increase
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in population of cities result more demand for
transport
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for their office work, unversities and other tasks.
This
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can cause more fuel consumption and more
traffic
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on
roads
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.
Consequently
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,
this
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has increased carbon emissions and
traffic
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problems.
Body paragraph 2
Another significant point is that an
increase
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in population in urban
areas
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also
Linking Words
puts pressure on public infrastructure. The main reason for
this
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is that more
people
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use the
roads
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and public
transport
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. As there is limited capacity on these
transport
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modes and
also
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on
roads
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.
This
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ultimately leads toward worsen the transportation conditions, as there is more demand for
transport
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facilities and wider
roads
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.
For instance
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, A large number of
people
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used the public
transport
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for travel
so
Punctuation problem
, so
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they face challenges in reaching their destination on time, because of
limited
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the limited
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service facilities available.
Conclusion
To encapsulate, I completely disagree that we should encourage
people
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to move to city
areas
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from other rural sites.
This
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is because it can cause more challenges in
traffic
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,
increase
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environmental pollution and
increase
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demand for public
transport
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.

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task response
Your view is clear from the start, and you answer the main question. To make the answer stronger, explain why moving people to cities is not the best way, and then say what may work better, such as better buses, trains, and jobs outside cities.
task response
Your main ideas are on topic: more cars, more air pollution, and more pressure on public services. However, some ideas repeat. Give each main point a clear new focus and explain it with one full example.
task response
Your examples are very general. Use one clear real or possible case. For example, say that if many people move to one city, buses may be full and roads may be slow at busy times.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear shape: an opening, two main parts, and an ending. This helps the reader follow your view.
coherence and cohesion
Make the links between ideas more natural. For example, change "As there is limited capacity on these transport modes and also on roads" to "Because roads and public transport have limited space, they may become too full."
coherence and cohesion
Avoid saying the same point many times in one paragraph. In the first main part, traffic is mentioned several times. Start with pollution, explain it, then move to traffic as a separate idea or a short final result.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear topic sentences. For example: "First, moving more people to cities may make air pollution worse." Then give the reason and example in a simple order.
coherence and cohesion
Check word forms and sentence grammar because they sometimes make the meaning less clear. For example, write "an increase in city population results in more demand" and "this leads to worse transport conditions."
task response
You clearly state that you disagree, and this view stays the same throughout the essay.
task response
You give relevant reasons, including air pollution, road traffic, and pressure on public transport.
coherence and cohesion
The use of separate paragraphs for each main reason makes the essay easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
The ending repeats your main view and key reasons, so the response feels complete.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
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