IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The pie charts describe the three types of
nutrients
Use synonyms
, namely
sodium
Use synonyms
, saturated fat, and added
sugar
Use synonyms
 which are consumed in the USA. A glance at the pie charts
reveal
Change the verb form
reveals
show examples
 that those
nutrients
Use synonyms
 are eaten mostly at
luch
Correct your spelling
lunch
 and
dinner
Use synonyms
. As a matter of
facts
Fix the agreement mistake
fact
show examples
, consuming a great
deals
Correct the article-noun agreement
deal
show examples
 of
such
Linking Words
nutrients
Use synonyms
 will harm
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health. It can be clearly seen that just over 40% of
sodium
Use synonyms
 is eaten at
dinner
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 only 29% of
sodium
Use synonyms
 is consumed at lunch. the exact percentages, both are 14% of
sodium
Use synonyms
, are taken for breakfast and snacks. The same proportion almost happens
int he
Correct your spelling
in the
show examples
 consumption of saturated fat. Most of the saturated fat is fed at
dinner
Use synonyms
. Followed by lunch which
use
Change the verb form
uses
show examples
 26% of saturated fat. Snacks and breakfast
also
Linking Words
 use saturated fat as the ingredients with percentages of 21% and 16% respectively.
Suprisingly
Correct your spelling
Surprisingly
,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of added
sugar
Use synonyms
 is used for snacks (42% of added
sugar
Use synonyms
).
Dinner
Use synonyms
 applies 23% of added
sugar
Use synonyms
.
Such
Linking Words
nutrients
Use synonyms
 can be found as much as 19% at lunch and 16% at breakfast.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such".
▼
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words nutrients, sodium, sugar, dinner with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrients
  • unhealthy
  • typical meals
  • percentages
  • saturated fats
  • fibers
  • sugars
  • impact
  • average
  • consumption
  • trends
  • breakfast
  • lunch
  • dinner
  • highest
  • lowest
  • variation
  • implications
  • balanced diet
  • recommendations
What to do next:
Look at other essays: